Bitcoin goes on wild ride and it may only get crazier

Bitcoin price goes on wild ride: the value of one bitcoin ricocheted in overnight trading from $106 to as high as $147, then back down to $125, then to $141.

Bitcoin price goes on wild ride: the value of one bitcoin ricocheted in overnight trading from $106 to as high as $147, then back down to $125, then to $141. submitted by i_eat_cereal_AMA to technology [link] [comments]

Bitcoin price goes on wild ride - CNN Money

Bitcoin price goes on wild ride - CNN Money submitted by waspoza to Bitcoin [link] [comments]

CNN:Bitcoin price goes on wild ride

CNN:Bitcoin price goes on wild ride submitted by gt7 to Bitcoin [link] [comments]

cnn.com: Bitcoin price goes on wild ride - Bitcoin Forum - The Unofficial Bitcoin Forum

submitted by bitcoinforum to Bitcoinforum [link] [comments]

It's beginning to feel a lot like 2017. Some useful reminders and advice for new comers.

Hype and increasing prices will undoubtedly attract new investors, HODLers, and gamblers. Regardless of how long you've been in crypto, below are a few pieces of information (or reminders) you should consider.
  1. We're still early. Cryptocurrency, including bitcoin, is still in its infancy. Because of this, we will continue to see headlines of hacks, exchange closures, big name investors coming into the space, major institutional adoption, and everything in between. Until crypto is regulated (for better or worse) and even after, there will be bad actors attempting to steal your cryptocurrencies. To that end, think twice when hearing about 'deals' or investments that seem too good to be true. They probably are.
  2. Protection. I often see questions regarding the storage of cryptocurrencies. Not to oversimplify, but as a user, you have ~3 choices to store your cryptocurrency. In order of most secure to least secure:
    1. Cold Storage - From wikipedia: Cold storage refers to storing Bitcoins/Cryptos offline and spending without the private keys controlling them ever being online. This resists theft by hackers and malware, and is often a necessary security precaution especially dealing with large amounts of Bitcoin. If you aren't comfortable manually storing your private key, physical hardware wallets are your best alternative. When possible, buy direct from the manufacturer to avoid any tampering to your new device.
      1. https://trezor.io/
      2. https://www.ledger.com/
    2. Hot Wallets - From investopedia: The difference between a hot wallet and a cold wallet is that hot wallets are connected to the internet, while cold wallets are not. Hot wallets can be installed onto your mobile device and/or your web browser. Similar to cold storage, these hot wallets will 'store' your crypto and will be accessed to send/receive tokens, execute smart contracts, and conduct other transactions. There are many options to choose from, but MetaMask is as close to an industry standard as it comes, and the developer has recently implemented an ERC-20 token swap function. Again, download directly from the developer if you can.
      1. https://metamask.io/
    3. Exchanges - Exchanges certainly have their own purpose, most notably as an on and off ramp for your fiat currency (e.g., US Dollar, etc). However, when you read headlines like "Bitcoin Hacked for 10 million dollars!" what they usually mean is, a centralized exchange that holds users' cryptocurrencies was hacked and bitcoin was extracted from the exchange's storage. For this reason, exchanges are considered to be less safe than your Hot Wallet and Cold storage alternatives.
  3. Don't be greedy. This is easier said than done, and many veteran traders have learned this the hard way -- some still haven't learned. When prices are only going up, you're going to feel like a million bucks. But things dont go up forever. Ever. (Unless it's the Fed's balance sheet.. har har). Point being, it's okay to take profits along the way up. I guarantee you'll have an opportunity to re-buy those same tokens at a cheaper price, and you'll enjoy them even more the second time around.
  4. Don't spend more than you can afford. Hopefully this goes without saying, but the crypto space is extremely volatile. It is not uncommon to lose your entire investment with just one wrong token/ICO/scam. To that end; just use your common sense. It sounds easy, but when you're making money, sometimes it's hard to see the cliff at the end of the road.
  5. Keep learning. I joined the crypto space because I saw an opportunity to make money. It's been a wild ride, and I've learned a lot more than I've gained (from a monetary perspective). What i didn't expect to happen, was to open pandora's box when it comes to what Bitcoin (specifically) aimed to solve. My thirst for knowledge only expanded when I learned of the opportunity space Ethereum was trying to fill. Compound that with the immutability of blockchain technology, DeFi, smart contracts, data oracles, (and the list goes on); now I'm completely hooked. It's clear to me that blockchain will revolutionize the way we function on the global scale. But many are just now beginning to learn about bBitcoin, and we're ahead of the curve. Which leads me back to point number 1; we're still early.
Sorry for rambling on here; I'm sure more veteran HODLers have already X'd out of this post, which is fine. They likely don't need this information as they have learned these same tips along their own journeys. But for newcomers to the space, I wish I had this foundational knowledge from the get go. Don't be afraid to ask questions on this sub. With the recent implementation of MOON tokens (this is a whole 'nother topic), I've personally noticed more downvotes than normal. But awareness and understanding is critical to adoption, so don't be turned off if you don't get an answer to your questions immediately. There is a wealth of knowledge scattered across the internet, and still a lot of smart people on reddit who are willing to help.
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DITO rockets up 20%, drops 30%, then finishes flat... the Aristocrats! (Wednesday, Oct 7)

Happy Wednesday, Barkada --

The PSE closed down 28 points to 5911 ▼0.5%.

Good news! I have a couple of people who are potentially interested in sponsoring MB, so I'm excited to explore those opportunities. My goal has always been to simply be revenue neutral, and to keep MB free for everyone to enjoy. (inb4 "RAID Shadow Legends" ad)
Shout-out to Christine for her suggestion to try and improve the bottom-line of MB by moving from Mailchimp to SendFox. It's something I'm going to look into, but I'm very careful about making changes. I'll have to investigate. Thanks also to Jack_ol_lantern for suggesting ways to leverage my domain to try a "roll your own" alternative, and to nikohd for suggesting I offer a bitcoin donation address.
I've got lots to study this weekend! No complaints here, though. Exciting times in MB town.

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MB is posted to /PHinvest every Monday and Wednesday, but my newsletter goes out daily. To stay in the loop for daily email delivery, please join the barkada by signing up for the newsletter, or follow me on Twitter.

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Monthly Update: Parachute Social Liquidity Pools, Ivan(OnTech) Joins as Advisor, Townhall, Trending on CoinGecko, Covered by EllioTrades Crypto + Altcoin Buzz, …– 31 Jul – 3 Sept'20

Monthly Update: Parachute Social Liquidity Pools, Ivan(OnTech) Joins as Advisor, Townhall, Trending on CoinGecko, Covered by EllioTrades Crypto + Altcoin Buzz, …– 31 Jul – 3 Sept'20
Hola folks! Yesterday we got caught up with everything that happened in July 2020 at Parachute and ParJar. Today, I will be sharing news from August. Looking back at those five weeks, they were easily one of the most action-packed ones in the Parachuteverse ever. If you missed my note about the new format from yesterday: “…I thought it would be best to club all the Parachute news into monthly reports and publish them back-to-back over the next few days to catch up with the latest…For a change, we will be focusing on Parachute + ParJar news alone in these monthly reports. Because if we include news from our partner project in these, we might as well publish the Encyclopaedia Britannica”. In case you thought yesterday’s was a long read, boy are you in for a shock today. Make sure to get yourself a beverage and set aside an hour to go through all that will follow. So here’s goes the Parachute scrolls dating 31-Jul-20 to 3-Sept-20 –
31 Jul – 6 Aug'20:
$PAR became one of the top trending coins on CoinGecko this week. The token also received a perfect score on DEXTools. Pretty sweet! We crossed 2500 members in the Parachute channel after quite a while. But no sign of Ron yet. Haha. BrainiacChess Network ($CHESS) was added to ParJar. We got a surprise listing on Hotbit ourselves with an ETH and BTC pairing. $PAR was listed on CoinW exchange this week too. More details here. Looks like wrapping up a day at Parachute usually ends with steaks. If you ever thought otherwise, a look at the $PAR contract should dispel that doubt. A community vote was opened up to list the next token on ParJar. Congratulations to Chirag for winning this week’s Parena and taking home 6k+ $PAR. Neat! Everybody knows about the bitcoin pizza. But did you know about the bitcoin burger? Read all about AlBundy185's crazy BTC journey here. What a wild ride indeed!
AlBundy185’s BTC ride has to be a stuff of legends
Pic of Gian with Diamond Dallas Page taken from his epic WCW Thunder story (https://t.me/parachutetokengroup/395125). Spooky sent us!
Gian announced a temporary stoppage of Two-for-Tuesday to make way for the second annual Big Brother contest. Soon after, he opened up entries for the contest. Woot! Fans can also get updates and spoilers from the GC’s BB group. Gamer Boy hosted a “Random Gk” trivia in TTR this week. Naj hosted a Sunday “Mega Trivia”. Afful held a “General knowledge” trivia as well. Sebastian shared the new ParJar Gaming schedule for August. Yes, you read that right. 75k $PAR in the monthly prize pool. Woot! For this week's Friday creative prompt (#nottodaycovid) by Jason, Parachuters talked "about what you are doing to keep yourself sane during the pandemic" for some cool $PAR.
Alejandro’s betta fish collection is a sight for sore eyes
Elmar, these are all amazing!
Model ships made by Bada during the lockdown. Awesome!
Ivan (from Ivan on Tech) joined the Parachute channel this week. Looks like next few weeks are going to be super exciting! Doc Vic hosted a flash game in the Parachute War Zone for some cool $PAR prizes. Mario had an interesting idea. Change the ParJar display name to “ParJar Wallet” to actually reflect the true nature of ParJar. And voila! “ParJar” is now “ParJar Wallet”. Instant feedback implementation! We also finally got an unofficial price chatter group running. As we mentioned in the last update, Clinton released a limited edition shirt in the Parachute Store this week to commemorate the Liquidity Program on Uniswap. Some of the Parena merch had to be sunsetted from the store though. So if you grabbed some before that, you are now the proud owner of rare Parena merchandise. James from the Parachute Athletics and Running Club announced a Secret Challenge for 400 $PAR. Cap shared a sneak peek into what’s brewing behind the scenes. He also posted some experimental visuals for the website and for ParJar:
Cap’s creative spurts are super trippy! Pt. I
Trippy creatives from Cap Pt. II
7 Aug – 13 Aug'20:
ParJar did some heavy lifting on behalf of Uniswap this week when Uniswap got clogged but ParJar swaps were running smoothly. If you haven’t seen how swaps work yet, CF made another cool video tutorial. Following last week’s community vote, Enjin ($ENJ) won a spot to become the next swappable token on ParJar. DMM DAO’s $DMG token was listed on ParJar as well. Inputs from the community were taken for listing the next DeFi token on ParJar. A new tier was added for the Parachute Uniswap Liquidity Rewards Program this week. Last week’s incredible Parachute run on CoinGecko was noticed by many including DAO Maker and Blockfyre. We got word that Parachute was featured in Ivan’s (Ivan on Tech) private report meant for his closed group of subscribers. Word on the street is that Parachute was reviewed in detail in the Hidden Gems section of the report and received the highest score among all the projects covered there. Super cool! He also talked about Parachute in his latest video. Watch out for timestamps 42:23 and 47:48. And followed it up with another mention in next day’s video as well. Pretty cool! $PAR also saw some crazy movements and activity. And all this started while Cap was chilling on an Amtrack on his way to Vermont. Haha.
Cap shared this amazing view from Vermont
Check out the Sentivate gear in the Parachute shop. For this week's creative prompt (#donkeyart), Jason had Parachuters "find an image of a piece of art that particularly moved" them and explain how and why. Darren’s Mega Friday Trivia in Tiproom had a sweet 6300 $PAR prize pot. Peace Love (Yanni) hosted another quiz in TTR with some more cool $PAR prizes. Clinton’s charity For Living Independence (FLI) became Lumenthropy’s spotlight charity this week which means they will be matching all $XLM donations to FLI. Lumenthropy is Stellar’s charitable arm. The entries to Gian's Big Brother Contest closed this week with Gian starting to share updates on episodes and $PAR rewards to weekly winners. If you want to catch all the action, head over to the BB Group set up by GC. And the most amazing thing happened this week – As new folks were joining into the Parachute group, someone named Ender Wiggin chimed into the chatter and as we talked we figured that he was not only Cap's neighbour in NYC but was also my school senior. Parachute truly brings the world together! PARs & Recreation wants to create a Parachute foodies group. And if his posts are anything to go by (figs, blueberries, Ikura), it’s going to be a hunger-inducing channel. Doc Vic (from Cuba) announced the start of a team Deathmatch tournament in the Parachute War Zone.
Congratulations, Clinton!
Looks like an epic ParJar video is underway. Parachute was also covered extensively by EllioTrades Crypto this week. YouTuber CM TopDog too made an awesome video on Parachute where he talked at length about the project, the roadmap, the token and more. Saweet! After seeing Albundy185 struggle with pooling on Uniswap, Cap and Ice had a light bulb moment for an entirely new feature on ParJar that would make pooling social and fun. More details to be released over the next few weeks.
Jose’s epic new gif puts Cap’s lightbulb moment about social pools into perspective :D
Looks like Alexis’ neighbour is into Uniswap pools as well. Get it, get it? Haha
Congratulations on the new store, Hang! Folks who don't know, Hang is building a hempire. World domination next
14 Aug – 20 Aug'20:
As mentioned last week, Cap and crew had something cool brewing for folks who pool assets on Uniswap. Presenting Social Liquidity Pools (SLP) by Parachute. No more pooling/staking alone in silos. Get together with others doing what you love most – pool assets on Uniswap (either directly or through ParJar - upcoming), then stake the received liquidity tokens into SLPs on ParJar to get additional rewards and social bonuses like entry into VIP or premium token curated groups. Making Uniswap social! Click here to read about what’s next for ParJar and Parachute. The first Uniswap $PAR Liquidity Pool Rewards Program came to a close. All qualified poolers will receive their rewards in 2 months. DeFi superstar yearn.finance ($YFI) was added to ParJar this week for both sends/tips and swaps. Woohoo! Waifu in the house. After last week’s community inputs regarding the next new token on ParJar, a public vote was started. Uptrennd founder Jeff Kirdeikis’ latest project, TrustSwap ($SWAP), got listed on ParJar after winning that vote which got a shoutout from Ivan as well. So now we have a tongue twister on our hands. Haha. Cap also shared the first hints about $PAR governance. More details to be posted next week. Plus, Cap announced that he will be hosting a townhall next week. Stay tuned! Get your questionnaire ready. Like last week, Parachute chatter popped up in Ivan’s latest video this week as well.
Dang! What an amazing place, Victor
For all the mobile gamers out there, Tony set up a Parachute Corporation for the EVE Echoes game. Hit him up if you want to join. Naj hosted a Sunday TTR trivia with a 6300 $PAR prize pot. Gamer Boy held one as well. Darren’s Mega Trivia in Tiproom was super fun as always. Jason did an impromptu token giveaway so that fellow collectors could complete their ParJar collection followed by a mini contest to "guess the closest to the number of miles I am about to run" for some cool $PAR. Chris hosted this week’s creative Friday prompt (#adminfunday): “Using the profile image of any Parachute admin as inspiration, draw what you think that admin would like to do on the weekend”. And what an amazing video Hans (Pad of DeFi Chad). Haha! Super hilarious and fun.
Some of the radest #adminfunday entries. Clockwise from top left: Skittish, TyReal, Staph It!!, Yosma, Ik Now, Jeff, Chica Cuba, Jhang, Kuuraku
21 Aug – 27 Aug'20:
Ivan (from Ivan On Tech) joined Parachute as an advisor. Woot! Welcome to the Parachute fam. Here’s a sneak peek into what the first day discussions with Ivan as an advisor revolved around. The project got featured in France’s largest crypto news platform, Journal du Coin. Noice! Click here for the English translated version. As mentioned earlier, Cap hosted a townhall this week. If you missed it, you can catch up here. He also shared a rough draft snapshot of “how the governance and fee distribution contracts could look for ParJar Wallet”. Plus, some updates from this week and a big picture view at what staking liquidity through ParJar could look like. Parachute also got mentioned in another of Ivan’s videos this week.
Snapshot from the Parachute Townhall
In partnership with Sentivate, ParJar distributed $SNTVT tokens this week to 1500 people of whom 800 were new users. Sentivate hosted this drop for members of a specific group as a token of appreciation for their support. Reminiscent of the AMGO drop, this was a precursor of “how PAR drops + other token drops could work for our Social Liquidity pooling”. The $PAR Governance whitepaper was released and initial brainstorming started in the tokenomics group. Cap was also interviewed by YouTuber Money Party (@Edward_F) this week to talk at length about where we are at and where we are heading. We also received a super duper shoutout from CryptoTube in his latest video where he did a deep dive into ParJar and Parachute. Thanks a ton! Cryptovator did a cool feature on the project as well.
Cap added more changes to the site to show: \"ParJar wallet in action along with…the integrations\" + Big Picture
In this week's creative contest, Jason put up a #writingprompt: "...imagine you are a brand new intern at my new mega corporation...Today is your first day and you are told you need to present something about crypto to upper management...all you know is Bitcoin is a thing and some vague information about it. Pick a coin or general crypto subject and write a short story...None of the facts or material can be correct in your presentation...". Haha! After helping fellow Parachuters with their ParJar collection last week, Jason set up a collector’s group this week. If you have more than 30 of the coins/tokens listed on ParJar in your @parjar_bot collection already, send Jason a PM and he will get you in. Victor hosted a “Big Trivia” in TTR this week for 6300 $PAR in prizes. Afful held a quiz in Tiproom on “General Knowledge” as well. Check out these wicked new shorts in the Parachute Store based on Jose’s gif.
Epic stuff, Jose! Haha
Nice haul from the Parachute Beer Exchange, CF! Markus did you a solid
Boldman Stachs pointed out that $PAR had the highest Galaxy Score on social media analytics platform LunarCRUSH this week. Pretty neat! CF took note. And like Cap mentioned, it has mostly been thanks to him. Haha. And big up to Jesús (@JALBARRAN02) for making a ParJar guide video for our Spanish crew. You rock! Interesting results from the DeFi survey: majority of crypto folks are still DeFi-curious. A new community vote was thrown open for listing the next DeFi token on ParJar. Anyone who's been around a bit already knows that Clinton does some amazing work at his charity, For Living Independence, which creates assistive technology for disabled individuals. This week he shared some snaps of a build which now enables a lady in a wheelchair get upstairs in her home.
This is so wholesome, Clinton! Thank you for doing what you do.
28 Aug – 3 Sep'20:
ParJar was featured in Altcoin Buzz’s latest video. Noice! Click here and here to read some recent updates from Cap. After winning last week’s vote, Akropolis ($AKRO) became the latest token to be listed on ParJar. Woot! bZx crew gave some serious competition too. So we had to get them on ParJar as well. $BZRX was listed this week right after $AKRO. $PAR now has 7k on-chain HODLers. Saweet! Sentivate will be our first partner project to have a Social Liquidity Pool on ParJar. This is amazing! Time for another community vote to get a new project listed on ParJar – this time it is DeFi Pie v/s Ren v/s Proxi DeFi v/s Others. If you’ve missed all the latest Parachute-related videos, we have your back. Check this tweet thread to catch up. Naj hosted a Saturday Tiproom Trivia for 6300 $PAR in prizes. Congratulations to Maria for winning the latest Parena. 8k $PAR in the bag. Woohoo! And congo rats to Yanni as well for winning a special edition shirt from the Parachute store. Gamer Boy’s Big Trivia in TTR saw a ton of participation as always. The Parachute Fantasy Football contest is back! Chris set up the entry rules this week.
CF has done wonders for Parachute’s social metrics: “..+500% in our fi(r)st marketing month..”
Whew, what a month! And with that we close for August 2020 @ Parachute/ParJar. See you again with one more epic monthly update tomorrow. Cheerio!
submitted by abhijoysarkar to ParachuteToken [link] [comments]

15 Apps That Will Earn You Passive Cash Back (Best Passive Saving Apps 2019)

This is the updated 2019 Q1/Q2 version of this post. If you remember reading the previous iteration of this post, there are several changes to the list this time around. Some new additions, and some removals.
I'm not necessarily listing these apps/sites off from best to worst, but the higher names on the list came to my mind faster, which basically just means that I prefer them.
Note: Most of these apps will be US only. A couple on this list are for Canada as well, and I've tried to make notes about apps that work outside of the US.
Having said that, let's get right into it.

15 Passive Cash Back Apps 2019

Pei

Ref = fish

Pei is an automatic cash back app, very similar to Drop (listed below). When you sign up, you'll link a debit/credit card and you'll then automatically start earning cash back as you shop at certain Pei merchants (listed just below). There are so many merchants with Pei that you'll likely find yourself accidentally earning cash back on the app, without even knowing it. Pei is an app that you can really just link a card and then check back weeks later and surprise yourself with the money you've earned. The app has improved so much since the first time I posted about it, that it deserves the top spot in this post. You can cash out instantly as soon as you reach $15 in your account, and they're currently offering a cool $5 bonus when you sign up with a referral. My referral is "5LTZ1S". Big appreciate if you use my referral to sign up.

Pros of Pei:

So with all of that being said, let's talk about the stores you can find on Pei. Just note that these are only stores that are local to me, so if I don't have a certain store near me that Pei offers, I won't have it on this list. Additionally, Pei actually offers so many stores at this point that there's no way for me to actually keep this list up to date at all. There have been countless times where I've shopped somewhere that doesn't even come up as an option to earn with Pei but I'll see cash back listed on the app. It's really quite impressive.
In addition to receiving cash back at many locations, Pei also has a 'loyalty bonus' where if you shop at a certain store 5x you'll earn a bonus of $0.50!
They also do offer a "$2 on $20", essentially meaning that if you spend $20 at a certain merchant, you'll earn a $2 bonus. Local for me, I have the following options for $2 on $20:
I feel like a lot of people will enjoy this ~10% bonus on UbeLyft, especially if you ride a lot.
Most stores do have a $5 daily/weekly earning limit, so do be aware that if you spend more than ~$500, you'll likely reach an earning cap.

Drop - (iOS | Android)

Ref = fish

Drop is a passive loyalty program for US/Canada that allows you to choose 5 popular stores where you'll earn cash back (automatically) at as soon as you shop at them (both online or in store). You'll start off by linking your cards to drop (credit or debit), and they'll automatically track your purchases and once they notice a purchase from one of the 5 stores that you selected, you'll automatically earn cash back in the form of drop points which can be redeemed for instant gift cards to several stores.
As mentioned above, once you register you'll be presented with a list of store options. Do note that the stores you choose might be stuck with you forever, so pick stores you plan on shopping at a lot in the future, since you might never get the opportunity to change them.
For a new user signing up today, here are the current options you'll be presented and the corresponding rate:
Do note that this list may change at any time, but historically whatever rate you receive when you sign up is the rate that will be locked in for you.
Here are a couple things that are worth noting:
Other ways to earn with drop:
While the passive options have already been discussed, I think it's important to highlight some other features that the Drop app provides. In addition to your ongoing offers, you can also earn on Drop by participating in mini game challenges, one time offers, mobile offers/linked offers, Supercharge mini game, and referring friends.
Let's talk a little about that:

HOOCH Rewards (Ref Link)

HOOCH is a new addition to this list. Similar to Drop and Pei, HOOCH will automatically earn you cash back when you link a credit/debit card.
If you understand how Drop or Pei work, there's not really much more to say about HOOCH's cash back system.
You'll instantly earn 1% cash back at the following national brands:
  • Uber
  • iTunes
  • Starbucks
  • Domino's
  • Netflix
  • Shake Shack
  • Spotify
  • Audible
  • Redbox
  • Uber Eats
  • Hulu
  • In-N-Out
  • Chipotle*
*I don't see Chipotle listed, but I've definitely been earning cash back from Chipotle for each of my purchases.
In addition to 1% cash back at the national brands, here are some other ways you'll earn with HOOCH:
  • Connecting your first card ($5 bonus)
  • Drink at a HOOCH Venue (5%)
  • Book a Hotel (5%)
  • Dine at a HOOCH Venue (5%)
  • Refer friends
HOOCH started a long while back as a subscription app where you'll buy a subscription and you'll get a free drink at a HOOCH venue every day. The venues are extremely limited, so a majority of the people reading this won't find any value in that plan. Dining is just as rare.
Their referral system appears to be pretty generous. They're currently offering a $5 bonus for each friend you refer, as well as a 20% bonus on their earnings for life. Here's my referral link, if anyone cares enough to click it.
Here's the downfall of HOOCH:
You can only cash out for gift cards, and the minimum is $25.
For most people, this is a really big disadvantage of this app. Assuming that most people will only be earning through the 1% cash back brands, the minimum you'll need to spend in order to his the cash out minimum is $2500, which would likely take most people a really long time, since the brand options are not places where you're likely to spend a lot of money frequently...like, for example, a grocery store.
But still, you could probably earn yourself a few free gift cards every once in a while for a totally passive app.

Butter

Canada Only!

The ability to earn cash back with Butter is currently only available to Canadians. If you're in the US and you're interested in Butter, you can still use their limited US friendly version here. Canadians, don't use this link!
Butter is a service that allows you to track your ongoing subscription services while earning cash back from them 100% passively. When you sign up for Butter, you'll link your bank account/cards and it will automatically help you track your subscriptions (think Netflix, Dropbox... almost anything, really) by telling you how much you're spending on each. This actually seems like something I could really benefit from, because I just recently discovered a subscription that I totally didn't realize I was paying for for the last 6+ months. You'll also earn 1% cash back from each subscription Butter tracks.
I would provide a list of the subscriptions that you can earn cash back, but according to butter, the "list is in the 1000s."
You'll earn your cash back automatically by Interac e-Transfer once your cash back balance is over $25.
$25 is a steep minimum, but if you're someone who either has a lot of subscriptions or has some expensive qualifying subscriptions, it might not take too long to reach the minimum.
Since I'm not Canadian, my experience with Butter is very limited. You can read more about how cash back works in their help threads here.

Bumped - Sign up & join waitlist!

Bumped is an investing app, when you really boil it down. When you sign up you'll select one brand in each category (there are a lot of categories, you'll see below), and each time you shop at the selected brand, you'll earn the certain specified purchase back in the form of company stock. This is unique to all of the other apps on this list, because you're actually receiving company stock. Also, because of this, I think it's very important to note that in order to sign up for Bumped you'll need to enter your SSN since you will be opening up a brokerage account.
As of posting, the following are the category options that you can choose from:
I've bolded the brands I selected. Obviously you should pick a brand that you can find yourself using the most. Do note that if you pick a brand that you might want to change later, you'll get the opportunity to change your brands 3 times a year, at least 30 days in between.
Category Options
Burgers 3% at Jack in the Box
3% at McDonald's
3% at Wendy's
Coffee 2% at Dunkin' Donuts
2% at Starbucks
Drug Stores 2% at CVS
1% at Walgreens
Family Dining 2% at Applebees
2% at Chili's
2% at Olive Garden
2% at Red Robin
Grocery 1% at Kroger Family of Stores
Home Improvement 1% at The Home Depot
Mexican Food 2% at Chipotle Mexican Grill
2% at Taco Bell
Music Subscriptions 1% at Pandora
5% at Spotify
Pizza 1% at Domino's
5% at Papa John's
2% at Pizza Hut
Superstores 1% at Target
1% at Walmart
Telecommunications 1% at AT&T
1% at T-Mobile
3% at Verizon Wireless
Video Subscriptions 1% at Netflix
5% at Sling TV
Vineyards 1% at Willamette Valley Vineyards
One thing that is listed on the app is that if you want to move your way up on the waitlist you can refer your friends to join the waitlist as well.

Uber Visa Local Offers

Shop or dine out, get Uber credits back.
Use your Visa card next time you dine out or go on a shopping spree at a featured store and earn Uber credits toward future rides. To join, go to settings in your Uber app and tap on Visa Local Offers.
Whenever you shop out at certain places you'll instantly receive uber credits to your account. It's really simple, and yes, this does stack with all of the other cash back apps you might be a part of.
The brands they offer do change semi-frequently, so you should check them from time to time.
In the past there have been 100% cash back offers for streaming services, and 10-20% cash back at Sam's Club. Considering that these offers do stack, there is some really great potential if you find any value in uber credit.
If you're interested in activating the Visa local offers, you'll need to make sure you have a visa card linked to your Uber account first, and then you should see "activate local offers" in the app settings or payment settings of Uber.
There's really not much to say about Visa Local Offers, but if you're looking for some FAQ/Terms, feel free to check them all out here.

Groupon+

Groupon+ is a card link program introduced by Groupon that will automatically earn you cash back when you shop at select local restaurants.
The program is pretty easy to understand, but it isn't completely passive. In order to receive cash back at the local restaurants, you'll first need to activate the offer. So for example, I have an offer for 20% cash back at Dairy Queen (10% cash back after first purchase).
For reference, here's the offer in question. Once I click claim, the offer will automatically be applied to my credit card that I have linked (you'll need to link a credit card/debit card the first time you try to claim an offer). Now that it's claimed, when I go into this dairy queen location and spend with my linked card, I'll automatically receive a rebate after my purchase. What's great about Groupon+ is that the rebate will instantly go as a credit/debit card statement adjustment. So if I'm getting 10% cash back somewhere and I spend $18, I'll automatically see an addition of $1.80 on my credit card statement. It's pretty satisfying.
Note: The location you claim does seem to matter. For example, linked above is a Dairy Queen location in Joliet, IL. It appears to be that I'd only receive the cash back at this dairy queen location. For me if I search Groupon for "dairy queen", I'll find a ton of groupon+ offers (some of them different!) for many local Dairy Queens. Just make sure you've selected the right location if you're earning from a chain restaurant.
Overall I think Groupon+ is worth checking out. Just note that a lot of the options will be for local businesses.

Cash App "Boosts"

For those if you who don't know what Cash App is, Cash App is an app by Square that lets you send and receive payments. They've also expanded their app to support bitcoin purchases, and they'll also let you use the app as a checking account. With the cash app you can also sign up to receive the Cash Card, which is a debit card that is funded with your cash app balance.
If you have not used Cash App before, they do have a fancy referral program where when you sign up and send $50 you'll receive $5 and so will I. I do want to make this very clear: Cash App referrals can see the full name of the person who refers you, and the person who refers you will have your full name shown to them. If you're really private about personal information, be careful whose referral link you use. If you trust me, here's my referral link.
Please note that if you want to use the cash app boosts that I'm talking about, you'll need to be 18 years old and have the cash card (which is free, don't worry)!
Cash App announced that their cash card will be seeing 'boosts'. Boosts are their fancy way of saying that when you use our card at certain locations you'll receive a discount.
Once you have the cash card, you'll notice on the app below your card you'll be able to select your boost. The following are my personal boost options, as of posting. The boosts change frequently,
  • 15% Off Doordash
  • $1 Off Any Coffee Shop
  • 5% off Whole Foods
  • 10% Off Buffalo Wild Wings
  • 10% Off Little Caesars Pizza
  • $1 Off Panera
  • $5 Off Any Purchase (requires using the card 10x to activate)
  • 10% Off Chipotle <3
  • 10% Off Dairy Queen
So there are quite a few things I want to say & clear up.
  1. You can use a boost every 1 hour.
  2. You must select the boost that you'd like to use prior to the purchase. AFAIK you're able to swap which boost you want to use as often as you'd like. So when you walk into Chick-Fil-A, just check and make sure your boost is set to CFA. If not, swap it.
  3. In order to apply the boost, you must pay with the Cash Card. It's automatic. If your total is $6 and you're saving 10%, you'll only need a Cash app balance of $5.4 for the transaction. Cash App will cover the other $0.60.
  4. If you link your Cash Card to Apple Pay, you can pay with it that way and the boosts will still be applied.
  5. This is important. If you have a boost applied, it won't expire. I'll repeat this. If you have a boost applied, It won't expire. So if Square wants to remove your beloved Chipotle boost, it'll stick with you until you decide to swap from it. If you really like it, don't swap! Do realize that just because you have the Cash Card on the app, you won't see the boosts. You need to have the physical Cash Card in your possession for the boosts to show up.
I've been really enjoying using the Cash Card for purchases. Especially at CFA & Chipotle. It's really not a hassle. When I'm standing in line at Chipotle I'll open the app and make sure my cash app balance is enough and if not I'll just add funds right away. The boost is applied immediately which makes you feel good. It's like the guac is free at Chipotle after you use the cash card. The only downside to using the Cash Card is that you won't be able to stack discounts with anything else on this list... Unless you find a way to link the Cash Card to any of the things on this list. Regardless, 10% off at Chipotle is the best I have found.

Empyr Apps

I've listed this as "Empyr Apps" because all of these apps are basically just the same thing. I'll take the example of Swagbucks Local since that's what most of you reading this will already be using.
If you paid attention in the Visa Local Offers section of this post, you'll find that the Empyr apps are actually very similar to those visa local offers.
When you shop at a certain store/restaurant, you'll earn with the empyr app you have linked. It's actually really not that special.
Here's a list of some/most of the current Empyr powered apps:
IMPORTANT NOTE: You're only allowed to use one Empyr app at a time! As soon as you link up with another Empyr app, you'll be disqualified from another until you link back up.
I do want to go into this list a bit this time around since there seem to be more and more Empyr apps popping up.
Dosh might be the most popular of these apps right now. Dosh has nice referral programs as well as sign up bonuses that makes it very enticing. Dosh also has very decent cash back at the stores they offer.
Swagbucks Local will always be popular among Swagbucks users. What's really nice about Swagbucks Local is that the payouts are always instantly converted to Swagbucks, which can help you cash out sooner. You'll also likely get a slot in the Swago board filled out, which might be beneficial to you.
Pei is a really cool new app on Empyr that offers cash back at a lot of places you likely shop at. I talk about it above.
RetailMeNot is a newer one on this list and it's the only one here that I feel like I recommend you go on/off with. RetailMeNot has recently been doing a lot of "Spend $X, get $Y" deals at a lot of the stores they offer. For example, they are currently offering $5 Cash back for in Store purchases of $30+ at Staples. This is a really good deal for an Empyr app, and would probably be my pick for that transaction, but not most of the time since they don't have very many stores as options.
I personally choose Dosh as my Empyr app. Dosh has a lot of funding, which allows them to offer some very generous offers from time to time.

CoinSeed (Ref | Nonref)

CoinSeed preface: I don't recommend CoinSeed as an option solely for passive cash back. The app has monthly fees, and even for just $1 a month, it will cut either entirely into your passive cash back earned, causing a net loss, or it'll take a huge cut. Only use CoinSeed for passive cash back if you actually want to use CoinSeed.
CoinSeed originally released about a year ago as an app similar to Acorns, where you're able to passively invest money by setting up a recurring investment or invest through 'rounding up' transactions. What makes CoinSeed different from Acorns is that they will take your money and invest it into cryptocurrency. Just recently they have also added a cash back section to the app which allows you to earn points in the app each time you spend at certain locations. Before we talk about the cash back from this app, I want to talk a bit about what you're getting yourself into.
Since CoinSeed is an app like Acorns, they're expecting you to use the app to invest money. If you're reading this and you're actually thinking that you'd be interested in using this app to invest into Bitcoin, there are a couple things I think should be pointed out. 1. There is a 1% fee taken from each deposit. 2. There is a fee of $1 per month that you use the app. Your first month is waived, so the fee will only kick in on the second month. The wording is confusing, but it seems like the fee will only apply if you deposit and invest in the given month. So let's talk about cash back.
Similar to many apps on this list, you'll link your cards to CoinSeed and that's how they'll track your transactions. CoinSeed actually has two different cash back offers. First of all they offer regular portals in the app. For example, shop at through our link and earn cash back! The reason I think this is important is because currently they're offering 2% cash back at Amazon.com when you shop through their link. Cash back is uncommon enough to find at amazon, but what's great is that the only restrictions listed is, "Doesn't apply on Gift Card." Which makes me think that so long as you're buying anything other than gift cards, you should be eligible for the 2% cash back. I've reached out to CoinSeed to clarify exactly what they mean by that (whether or not it is referring to just Amazon gift cards or third party gift cards as well).
The other offers on the app, which they call "Premium" are the passive cash back options, meaning that every time you spend at any of the brands listed, you'll earn cash back. Here are the options that are currently available:
  • Uber (1% cashback)
  • Netflix (1% cashback)
  • Starbucks (1% cashback)
  • 7-Eleven (1% cashback)
There's one issue, though. When you try to activate the premium offers, a popup will appear saying, "Sorry, this feature is only available for users who have made an investment using the auto investing feature." What this is essentially saying is that in order to earn cash back from premium offers you must invest with the app.
CoinSeed seems to want to emphasize that the cash back is only a benefit of using their app to invest in crypto. For most people, investing in crypto can be near feeless using alternate methods, and in my opinion this app really doesn't provide many/any benefits that would make me want to even consider using this app for the heavy fees that they take. You would need to be spending a lot of money with their cash back retailers in order for the 'I'm only here for the cash back' route to even start to sound viable.

Credit Cards

I've refrained from listing credit cards on this post for a long time. Maybe because I thought it was too obvious, or maybe it was unnecessary, but since the number of younger people using this subreddit has been increasing I feel like I'd be doing a disservice to entirely disclude a blurb about credit cards.
If you have a credit card and you don't really care to learn more about credit cards, just skip this section. If you're reading this post and you're 18+ (or if you're about to turn 18) and you don't have a credit card or don't know much about credit cards, I think it's a good idea to look into them. I'm not going to tell you exactly what a credit card is since that's an easy google search, but I will tell you about some benefits, especially about those that pertain to the benefits of this post.
Credit cards are great because you can essentially spend money just like you normally would*, but you'll also earn cash back on all/almost all of the purchases you make with them. Additionally, especially if you're young, getting a credit card is a really great because it will start helping you build credit. I'm currently looking into renting a house next year with two housemates and I'm shocked to see that neither of them have any credit. They quite honestly couldn't possibly live in a house without me, since I'm the only one who has credit.
*Make sure you're paying off your credit card every month (or however often you need)... Don't let yourself get into debt. I'd argue if you think you're going to get into debt with a credit card, I'd personally suggest you don't get a credit card.
While you need to be 18 years old to get your own credit card, if you're under 18, you can still start gaining credit. Most major credit card companies will allow your parents to add you as an authorized signer on their credit card (which basically just means that you'll get permission to use their cards). An effect of this is that you'll start gaining credit. If you're looking to build up credit but you don't think you're ready for a credit card, I'd really recommend you ask your parents about becoming an authorized signer. It's a good conversation to have with your parents.
Anyways, let's talk about the cash back benefits, since that's what this post is about, after all.
There's a lot of credit cards. This post isn't going to list them all out. This isn't really even the right subreddit for credit card discussion.
Nerdwallet has a great list of credit cards, so you might want to check it out here, but I'm going to share my own personal situation and recommend that for anyone who might relate, since the average age on this subreddit is around the 18-25 range.
My first credit card was the Chase Freedom Unlimited card. I actually still use this credit card very frequently since it's a pretty balanced card. A couple years back on my 18th birthday I went into my local chase branch and physically had to beg for this card (it's a really beginner card, trust me). After getting denied both in bank and online, I finally found a rep who would give me a calm $500 credit limit for the card. Note: I had no credit before hand.
The Chase Freedom Unlimited card offers 1.5% cash back on all purchases with the card... so when you think about it, I'd previously been spending $100 at Chipotle every month with my debit card, but with the Freedom Unlimited card, I would now be getting 1.5% cash back ($1.50) back on those purchases. It's just an easy way to save money on everything.
If you use the other apps I suggest in this post, you'll likely earn cash back passively from them on certain brands that are featured, but stacking a credit card cash back on top of all the other bonuses is the absolute best way to earn passive cash back since it's usually 1-5% cash back on your purchases.

ReceiptPal

ReceiptPal is an app that allows you to upload your receipts from almost anywhere that you go shopping. It's actually a really simple process.
When you sign up you'll be presented with almost little scratch cards which contains 4 spaces. Each space is filled with a receipt that you upload. Once you reach 4 receipts, you'll earn 100 points. 300/400 points = $1, so basically every 16 receipts you upload you'll receive ~$1.
"So, mr Fishering, how is this passive!?"
Unlike most receipt apps, ReceiptPal allows you to link your emails and amazon account and they'll automatically upload receipts for you. I actually let this app alone for several months and came back to thousands of points and cashed out instantly.
If you make purchases online, you'll essentially be earning ~$0.07 for every purchase you make if you have your email linked. They'll automatically find receipts and submit them, so it's 100% passive earnings.
If you also shop IRL you can submit physical receipts as well.
You can cash out instantly for $5 minimum in the form of a gift card. I'd recommend saving up at least 7,500 points for a $25 gift card, since it'll value points at 300/$1.

Paribus

Paribus is not your typical cash back site. Once you sign up you can link your different accounts (such as your amazon account) and it will automatically track your shopping. Paribus doesn't directly earn you cash back... it acts more like Walmart's saving catcher if you've ever heard of that. If an item you buy somewhere goes on sale shortly after or if there's any other discounts/promotions you may have missed when you originally bought something, they'll quietly get you a rebate on whatever you purchased. It can be very hit or miss. The catch is that they do take a cut of your savings. I believe it is 30% for all new users, but for each member you refer you can cut the cut by 5%. If you save $10, they'll charge you $3 to whatever card you have linked.
Personally I've found it to be really hit or miss, but I've found some incredible savings. I bought a gopro and I got $15 saved with Paribus, and I also got $50 back from some really nice headphones I picked up on amazon from Amazon. What's weird is I bought the headphones like 6 months prior to the rebate. Was shocking to see it, but I've really had some good luck with Paribus.

Sift (iOS | Android)

After the last post, I noticed a lot of people enjoyed Paribus, so I figured it'd be good to add some alternatives in this post.
So, here's Sift. Sift is a similar site to Paribus, and its key focus is on enforcing credit card benefits that many people don't know about. It's actually pretty nice. It'll let you pick your credit card and it'll tell you pretty much everything about your card. I have the Chase Freedom Unlimited card, and I was actually shocked to hear some of the benefits my card has that I have never been taking advantage of.
From Sift's site:
We automatically comb through your credit card policies to show you all your benefits in one place. For every purchase we let you know what benefits you are eligible for. We streamline the claim process to make it as simple as possible to get your money back.
You can link your emails as well as your amazon account as well and they'll make it really easy for you.
I have not actually used Sift much myself, so I cannot attest to how well it works, but the app store reviews are generally positive for Sift.

Trim Savings

Trim is similar to Paribus and Sift, but there's a certain void that it's trying to fill that the other two don't really seem to be filling.
Trim's main selling point is its bill negotiations. Instead of trying to save you money when a price drops, they're going to try and just nip it right in the bud and try to get your bills lower.
Right now they're mainly trying to negotiate with cell providers, internet providers, and cable providers.
Here's how the process goes:
  • Submit Your Bill: Submit your most recent cell phone, cable or internet bill to get started.
  • Trim Negotiates: Trim negotiates with your provider to get you discounts on your bill.
  • You Save Money: Trim takes 25% of annualized savings, but only on success—otherwise, it's free!
So, similar to Paribus, Trim does charge a fee. In a sense, I guess that's a good thing because it gives them an incentive to make sure to get some sort of bill decrease for you so they'll make some money too. Their rate is currently 25% of your bill negotiation. Of course, if they're not able to negotiate your bill for you, you won't pay them anything.
Trim does also monitor your bank account for you and they'll notify you of account changes (that you can set). For example, if they see a transaction worth $xxx, they'll notify me that I've made a large transaction. If there weren't already so many other sites/apps that could do that, I'd say that's a great feature that Trim offers.

Conclusion

Hopefully there's some new apps/sites you found out about in this post. If you sign up for some/all of these programs listed, you should probably find yourself earning some pretty decent cash back, depending on where/how much you spend. These apps are very satisfying to watch your balances build up on, and after a while it's very rewarding to cash out and treat yourself.
Since the last version of this post, I have removed a lot of shitty offers, that aren't really worth anyone's time. I removed Samsung Rewards since it's been devalued to a point that using their app solely for rewards isn't worth it at all. Samsung rewards is only valuable for non-passive offers that they occasionally have.
In this update I added some really great additions, but did remove a previous favorite, Spent, which is currently offline. I'm ready to edit the post if anything changes with Spent, but it's seeming more and more unlikely since the app did go so downhill so fast.
As always if you have any questions please do leave a comment or send me a PM!
Thanks for reading!
submitted by Fishering to beermoney [link] [comments]

I will tell you exactly what is going on here, this is critical information to understand if you are going to make money in this space. How prices work, and what moves them - and it's not money invested/withdrawn.

/edit: Hi /all. While I have your attention, I want to take 5 seconds of your time and bring some exposure to something that is threatening our existence as the human race. If you aren't interested, please skip down to the main article. I'm talking about finding a way to live sustainably on this planet, regenerative agriculture, where we get our food from, and how we can make sure that our kids and grandkids have something left once we leave.
Please consider reading up on Permaculture, sustainable living, Forest gardening, Backyard Chickens, etc. Consider following what I did and do it for yourself. This all used to be a useless lawn.
Bored for a night? Go watch "Sustainable" on Netflix.
Look into people like Geoff Lawton, Mark Shepard, Sepp Holzer, these people are going to save us.
Want to make a small change yourself? Grow a tomato plant on your balcony in a pot. Reduce transport of the tomatoes you eat, and make ~$50 per plant in saved money. Want to do something bigger? Plant a fruit tree in your backyard. Maybe two. Maybe a raspberry bush. You are now part of saving the human race.
If everyone reading this planted a fruit tree, or even some wild flowers, we could save the bees.
While you are at it, planting a fruit tree has been shown to be one of the best investments on the planet. There's pretty much no investment on the planet that is more financially lucrative (while still being nearly bullet-proof safe) than planting a fruit tree.
You can get a tree at an end of sale auction for literally 5-10 bucks, and that tree will produce THOUSANDS of dollars of fruit for you in it's lifetime. Go spend $200 bucks at an end of season sale, plant 10-20 trees (if you have room), and that $200 will be worth tens of thousands of dollars of saved money.
Do it right, set it up right and it's almost no work because you offload the work to nature - as it has done for the last few billion years. Go learn how, let me show you how. If you do it right, it's zero work after you have planted and wood-chipped, and all you do is pull dollars off a tree.
Original post starts below. I apologize for the shilling of Permaculture, but I think loss of topsoil will impact us all if we don't reverse it soon. We need soil, we need bees, we need food. We need to stop buying December Bananas in Canada. We need to start supporting local permaculture sustainable farms. We need to do this or we may not make it, and our grandkids stand no chance.
I also expended the "now what happens" section, to explain how these pullbacks are a good thing, make crypto more stable, and why we keep seeing larger ceilings after every pullback... this stuff is really important for you to make money on this thing, if that's your goal....
I've made a similar post in a few spots, and this is something that is absolutely critical for people to understand... what impacts price, and what is going on lately. Price has only a very minor correlation with money invested, and a major correlation with opinion.
... and Humans are an emotional bunch.
So what drives price of any commodity, crypto, gold, pizzas, whatever? The money invested in it, right? Kind of, but not really. What if I told you that you could theoretically raise bitcoin from $15k to $20k by spending $1, and lower it from $25k to $1k by spending the same $1? Crazy right?
AN EXAMPLE
This is going to start out slow, I want to make sure I get everyone on the same page before I pick things up and lift the curtain. Stick with me here....
This is an example to help illustrate why prices aren't driven by money invested, but rather consensus and opinion. Lets imagine the following exists (we will use bitcoin as an example, but this is how everything on the planet works)
Lets say Bitcoin is currently priced at $10k (the last sale). From $11k to $99k, every $1k there is someone with a sell order of 1 full bitcoin. From $9k to $1 dollar, every $1k on the way down there is someone with a buy order of 1 full bitcoin.
So, right now if you wanted to buy bitcoin you have several options... meet the lowest seller's price of $11k, or, put your own buy order up, above the highest buyer's bid order (overcut them). If you decide to just place an order, the price doesn't change. If you decide the buy the $11k bitcoin, now bitcoins value is $11k, with a new lowest sell offer of $12k, and a highest buy bid of $10k. Someone else comes in an overcuts the buy bid and puts 1 BTC for sale for $11k. No trades are made until someone matches a buy/sell.
Okay, that's kindergarten stuff, most people here understand that. So how much money drove the price up in this situation? $11k, and BTC price raised 11/10, 1.10, or 10% from the last sale. Now the entire marketcap of BTC raised 10% (last sale multiplied by circulating supply). So it takes $11k to drive a 10% increase, right? Not at all. Lets look at what happens when news is released.
News comes out that Warren Buffet thinks bitcoin is a scam, a bubble, and he wouldn't touch it with a 10 foot pole because he only invests in things he understands and he doesn't understand crypto. People panic everywhere, and believe "this guy is smart, I'm overvaluing this thing".
Suddenly people don't want to buy this scam anymore, and the buy orders for $11k, $10, and $9k are taken down.
At the same time, the people wanting to sell start to panic and just want out. The guy at $32k (who just had that offer up "just incase it moons") drops down to $11k sell order. The guy at $12k, who was the lowest, now undercuts him to $10k.
The other buyers see the sellers undercutting and think that if these people want out, why am I buying in. The $8k guy pulls his offer, and so do the $7k, $6k and $5k guys. The highest offer is now $4k.
The sellers panic further and the $14k guy undercuts the $10k guy and puts up a $9k sell. The $15k, 17k and 11k guys all see this flurry of panic and now a storm undercutting is triggered, to $8k, $7k, and $6k. The $8k order pulls his again and goes down to $5k.
The price on the buy and sell orders has moved around a ton, but no sales have actually happened yet. Technically, BTC is still "worth" $11k, and the market cap reflects that. All this horseshit has happened, and it only happened in 10 seconds, but the price hasn't moved yet.
The $27k guy wakes up and checks his phone. He had a $27k offer just incase the price moved also, and he also only has a tiny infinitesimal fraction of a BTC. Well, he decides "he's out" and fills $1 worth of the part of the $4k guys buy offer.
The latest price information is now updated, and BTC fell from $11k to $4k price per BTC with the movement of a single dollar.
This is exaggerated example, but this is what moves price. Not money in vs money out. The ONLY THING that moves price is perception.
OPINION FLOW AND NOT MONEY FLOW
Now the above example only happens if everyone simultaneously believe the same thing... this the asset they are holding is a steaming turd. What happens in reality is there's no black and white, it's shades of gray. It's flow in vs flow out. But again, not flow MONEY, but rather OPINIONS.
If 66% of the holders of something all of a sudden unanimously decide that their asset is overvalued, then they panic sell. Even if 33% of the people decide they are going to buy up as much as these panic sellers sell, if the panic is strong enough, and they are slitting eachother's throat to sell, then the buyers just happily sit and let them do that, and time their buys in. Very little money has to actually change hands in order for this price to crash, all that matters is the FLOW OF OPINION has to be swift and violent, and in majority. The sellers will leapfrog eachother on the way down, faster than the buyers scoop up their sales, and the net result is a crashed price.
Note, this happens both ways... fear, uncertainty and doubt (FUD) as well as overhyped FOMO (Fear of missing out).
So now what happens?
Time goes by and all holders opinions of their asset hasn't changed. They still think it's worth $11k and they got great deals scooping up what these sellers were selling. The weak hands have left the market and have been replaced with holders. Overall, now a higher percentage of holders believe in the product they are holding and are unwilling to sell for the panic prices of the last week. Panic sellers were also replaced by new money, people who have wanted in for a while and are now in on their perceived ground floor.
Also, people who bought BTC at $1 ten years ago and have been looking for an exit to cash profits have now been replaced by either long term holders, or by these new people who are thrilled to have finally entered, and they are looking to hold long.
So what happens on pullbacks? The number of people waiting to jump off the ship has decreased. The new ground floor is established. Are we done? Who knows, this could go on for another year, but what matters is that people who want off are getting off and people that want on are getting on.
People who have panic sold and never believed in this in the firstplace... people who have wanted out for 10 years... they have been replaced by people who are now getting in on THEIR GROUND FLOOR, and are going to be holding long. The market is suddenly increasingly more stable today than it was yesterday, even though prices are down.
This is a good thing. This is why crypto keeps bouncing back from pullbacks and reaches new higher ceilings and floors each time. Old money who wanted out, and new panic holders, they are gone. They are replaced with adopters, holders, believers in this technology. These people aren't selling anytime soon, because they believe that this thing is going to revolutionize the world. Every crash brings more of these people in, and removes more panic sellers out.
Moving forward
Now news releases start coming out about how stock ETFs are being created, NASDAQ index funds, bank support, government support. Companies are using this tech, and companies who use blockchain for transportation are putting non-blockchain companies out of business.
The people on the outside looking-in feel they are missing out. They now start coming in and buying. They start overpricing eachother on their buy orders, and eventually it gets close enough to a sell order that someone decides they are just going to meet the sell price. The sale goes through.
Sellers (HODLERs) see this action, and they start pulling sell orders off the table almost as fast as they fill. Sure some trades go through, and incoming money is driving the price up as market orders are filled. But what's also happening is people are seeing this flurry of volume, and sellers are pulling sell orders and placing them higher.
Junk coins and pump and dump scam coins are dying by the millions. In their ashes, good solid technology projects whose coins have fundamental economic reasons for growth, these are rising. Corporate partnerships continue forming. The real world continues to create actual use cases. Companies start storing more and more corporate information on blockchain. Public companies use blockchain to store scientific research (See Canadian Research Council announcements), and blockchain acts as a Library of Alexandria. People can travel out of country without any monetary exchange, using their chosen cryptocurrency to buy the things they need abroad. The world is slowly actually USING this technology.
Money is coming in, but more importantly, OPINION IS CHANGING. Literally nothing could have happened in terms of fundamentals, partnerships, etc... this can all be driven entirely emotional, so long as it's wide-spread and strong. Infact, the market could THEORETICALLY rebound in this way from $4000/BTC to $1 MILLION PER BITCOIN by the sale of ONE PENNY. $4000 sound low? Does that number make you uncomfortable? We may go that low. We may not. If we do, I'm not panicking and selling, I'm buying more.
SO WHAT HAS HAPPENED IN THE LAST FEW MONTHS? and where are we going?
A lot of new money has come in from Nov-Jan, and they don't really know what they are investing in. Sure some of them have done great research and are smart investors but most people aren't and isntead they are buying Symbols and Names and trading on speculation. They are treating their favorite coins like a sports team, and will follow them irrationally off a cliff.
These new people came in and invested in cryptocurrency because their OPINION was heavily influenced in Nov, Dec, Jan, from media. They saw this money making machine called crypto. They were willing to pay huge, ride the wave up, keep buying, etc. They were "ground floor adopters" and were going to get rich.
They outnumber the old money by A LOT. Their OPINION MATTERS. It matters the most.
To keep this in perspective, they are also a VAST MINORITY of "new money" that will enter the game in the next decade. This cycle will continue over and over and over.
Their opinion rose nearly unbounded and price rose accordingly. Market cap rose from 10B to 750B, and it could have been VERY LITTLE actual money that did this. How much did it need to be though? Literally ONE PENNY, theoretically. All that matters in moving price is MOMENTUM OF OPINION. I believe it has been estimated that as low as 6B USD was responsible for the bull rush.
These people then started hearing "Bubble", "Scam", Fake news about governments banning. They don't understand how technology wins, always. Crypto is beyond government control. If they could have stopped Bitcoin they would have done it already.
WHO IS DRIVING ALL THIS?
Most investment opportunities go first to "accredited investors". You need to have multimillions in order to get in on the ground floor for most stock IPOs, and we're seeing that start to happen with coin ICOs. Bitcoin was a joke for the first few years, while lunatics picked it up. At this point, it was really too late to get in "early", and who would have wanted to anyways, it was all still a joke. So Wallstreet, banks, governments have generally watched on the sidelines as average Joes who were crazy enough to be early adopters and toss $100 on fake internet money slowly became millionaires.
Not only that, but the idea of blockchain started to become understood. The power and value in it became understood. Not only as a way to track "monetary value" but for many other applications as well. Platforms were created, business uses brainstormed, products started being made. This thing started taking off, and wasn't a joke anymore. But regardless, big money wasn't in on the ground floor. They have stakeholders opinions to think of, and what do they say to investors when they lose all their money on magic internet points?
But they have woken up now. This thing has "popped" many times now and keeps recovering. This thing won't die. could they have been wrong all along? If they want in, how do they get in? They are no dummies, they have been controlling the world their whole lives? Look at the media experiment that Trump is doing? He is testing just how we work... you can do literally anything and we remember it for like 30 seconds, until the next news story comes out. We change opinions very easily. We are swayed very easily. We are their puppets. Media controls the world. They know their way in.
They have ONE WEAPON against cryptocurrency.
YOUR OPINION OF IT.
And they know it.
Media.
That's why FUD is so powerful and needs to be respected. It's why we need to read more than titles on news articles. We need to question what we read, whether it's good news or bad news. We need to think about "what are the motives of the person saying this to me". Does the government have a conflict of interest when they state that crypto is gambling? Do they have skin in the game?
What about wall street? Does WEISS ratings possibly have incentive to come out with poor ratings? Do banks have incentive to lock accounts in order to "protect" customers from "unsafe investments" when their entire business model revolves around holding as much of your money as possible and making money off it? Do you think banks have any super secret hidden interest in preventing you from storing your money elsewhere? I'm not sure, maybe you can critically think about that.
Just understand that this goes both ways. When crypto is booming and Fox news is showing people how to buy $4 ripple on prime time, you may want to start putting in some stop loss orders. When the suicide hotline is stickied at the top of /cryptocurrency and everyone is panic selling, you may want to start picking up some firesale deals.
So, the question is this... Is crypto undervalued or overvalued at it's price today? Where is the price going long term? I'm not talking about it's use case, I'm talking about in the court of public opinion, where is THAT going? Because THAT is what is going to drive price in the future.
Without a crystal ball, this is of course impossible to know. Do your own research and form your own opinion. It could very well be that the technology having a use-case will in and of itself drive opinion, and thus price. But make sure you understand that it's not the technology itself, it's not the value of the business itself, it's not the use case itself that will drive price, it is the publics OPINION of that thing which drives price. They are intertwined, but they are NOT the same thing.
TLDR: VERY VERY little money has to move around in order to swing prices drastically, up or down. Money in and out doesn't drive price, OPINION does. How do you let the news you read impact your opinion?How are you being played (on both sides, shilling and FUD).
Something is only worth what people think it's worth. Often that's based on reality, value, business, money, but often it's entirely emotional.
Structure your portfolio in a balance, intelligent way, using risk methodology.. Invest money you are willing to lose. Support legitimate technology and teams who are actively driving their product to completion, coding, and marketing. Stop trying to make money overnight in pump and dump scams, or pyramid schemes.
Every day, take one coin, do a deep dive on it, learn it inside and out. Look into their team and their past. Do that every day for a year, and you just learned 365 coins inside and out. Ask yourself the following key questions:
Have those members consistently jumped ship on previous projects? Is that where you want to invest in? Is their team capable of executing on their vision? Are they trying to solve world hunger, and their team is a few 16 year olds in a garage? How active is their github? Are they adding chunks of code regularly, or is a ghost town? Are they marketing their product at all? Or is marketing the only thing they are doing?
What are the economics of their coin itself? Is it required to be used to gain access to their technology? Are there burns? How premined is it, and what portion do the founders hold?
What about their vision? Are they trying to solve a problem that needs to be solved? What are the economics of that problem and how much money does the solution potentially save clients?
These are all questions you should be asking when you give your money to someone else. We're a lot more stable than we were - a correction was bound to happen. Too much early money wanted to cash in profits. These people have been replaced by new money who is holding on their own ground floor. The whole industry in general is still in very early stages. Rest assured that anyone reading this is still very much an early adopter. Just make sure you are investing in actual technology, and supporting capable teams, and not buying air. Buy the Googles and Amazons of Crypto, not the pets.com or flooz.com of cryptos.
Happy investing everyone.
/EDIT: some have asked to donate some crypto. Do me a favour instead, sub to my YouTube channel (link at top) watch my videos how to get started properly, and plant your own trees and establish food sovereignty for your family and your community, and help save the bees, save our topsoil, and sequester carbon to reverse global warming. My goal is to get a gardener back into every home on the planet. THAT is how we heal this world.
submitted by Suuperdad to CryptoCurrency [link] [comments]

I am absolutely loving the direction Justin is laying out for Tron's future

Ethereum's greatest argument over Tron has been its "pure" solution to Zooko's Triangle, however this "integrate all the sidechains" mentality has me feeling great about Tron's future outlook. Have a specific use-case that might require a most-decentralized platform? Cool, use the designated side-chain since we'll have built in communication across chains. Each sidechain having its own massive capacity and additive to the overall network capacity. From a baseline concept I see this truly being competitive with Ethereum's sharding and I welcome the discussion on it.
Nearly 2 years into this bear market, how many projects can say they're still bringing real deliverables and improvements to continue building? Just as an aside and even as the market price is dropping off a cliff while I write this I see it akin to the dotcom bubble where it's just going to take time to correct. Meanwhile, CZ's advice to surviving bear markets "keep your head down and build" rings true to me and Tron is doing that.
I love hearing about real content from Justin. Bitcoin rises and falls, the market is upside down and no doubt manipulated by larger bodies and forces at play than just Tron in a vacuum, but the more time goes and seeing real innovation, adapting to technical challenges and keeping Tron an agile machine I really feel this is one of the projects we will see come out of the gates as a leader in the coming years.
There are some marketing tactics I absolutely hate that seem like their team doesn't really get Western culture (for example: spamming /tronix with micro-videos that literally no one comments on because they don't belong as their own post.) All that said there are many other ways to connect with the growing number of community members and I have to say this has been, and continues to be, an absolutely wild ride.
submitted by Grandpa_Willy to Tronix [link] [comments]

BTC, a response to the Cartel and the necessity of DeFi

Finding my legs in the Crypto sphere has been a wild ride to say the least. Watching BTC in particular drive up to its ATH was incredibly exciting for an anarcho-capitalist like me. I am not "allowed" to judge people as to why they are interested or invested in crypto, it is also an exercise in futility because in my opinion anybody invested/interested in BTC/Crypto are my allies. Allies in a fight against the central banks of the world - and the cartel.
Call me paranoid, but I have seen what the central banks are capable of. For me it began in 2008 or so when I saw the govt. and politics doing things that were against my interests. Upon investigation I learned what the FED was and seemingly what their agenda was. A really great animated short presents their 100+ years of existence and history before the FED was created, which can allow the observeinvestoenlightened a more macro perspective into why I think BTC and Cryptocurrencies were created. The video can be found here.
Two dimensionally we can see that the banking cartel are clearly not created for our best interest. I assert the banking cartel were created to control the money supply thereby limiting "peasant's" access to real assets in this world - controlling our lives, treating us like cattle. What crop are they harvesting? Our life force, our souls, our ability to create wealth. Do not sell humans short for an instant. We are capable of incredible feats, however, leashed like a broken horse we are now tools for the masters to reap financial benefits of our work/labointelligence/beauty/etc. The banking system, the diamond cartel in Africa, the enforcement through the military industrial complex are all a part of The Cartel.
The Cartel is extremely developed and they have another language for how they speak about world events. What we hear in this world is not the world as they know it. In the words of George Carlin:
It's a big club, and you ain't in it.
You will never be in it, and you better be damn sure they will kill people to ensure that they keep the club open. That is what the military industrial complex does for the cartel. Try to think of the cartel as a hydra. One head tends to political enforcement and squelches dissent (look at what is happening in Hong Kong), another head tends to financial enforcement not allowing the people to build wealth (see the FED). The more wealth people have- the more power people have, and the less they do; and they can't have that. The more power we as a population have, the less the enforcers have, and a next logical step forward would be prosecution of these corrupted heads of enforcement.
Now, after listening to market sentiment lately I hear a lot of people stressed about the recent dip in price. I think psychologically we are meant to feel this way by design. There is a great article that goes a little more in depth about crypto market manipulation and the CME, however, the main takeaway I found was this quote:
As price keeps dropping people start despising the asset. See what happened to Gold and Silver since 2011. The more it dropped the more people hated it. Many Gold bugs sold precious metals at the bottom and switched over to Bitcoin and Crypto (when it was at the top.) This exactly what “they” want the retail investor to do as “they” collect more of it at the lower prices.
Psychologically speaking, the financial industry as it is designed circa 1913-2008 has been a slow and steady blood letting of the population. They may stick only one needle and tube into your body but over a lifetime they will harvest an incredible amount of "energy" (money, resources, life-force) from just one individual .. also include trans-generational population control.
This is why bitcoin was created.
It was to free the people from this highly tuned machine that is consuming the souls of everybody you know. The sheer amount of on-chain data available and still being realized about the crypto markets (as now studied by Willy Woo and others) is likely tantamount to the data credit card companies are privy to. The cartel has generations of data with which to study and strategize their next enforcement campaign. We in the still very immature age of DeFi are only JUST discovering what we don't know.
We barely know: what we don't know..
This is why people are afraid of BTC/Crypto right now. This is why trolls and enemies and the unenlightened try to psychologically kill BTC/Crypto in the mind - it is a literal programming. It is a big machine and you and I are a cog, they are the driver. The beauty is, we have an instrument to finally break out of this prison of the soul. There will only ever be 21 million BTC, and after that value appreciates via the stock-to-flow ratio, that value will expand and follow paths of least resistance likely into a full fledged developed DeFi infrastructure - as the plan is laid out now. How and when we get there depends on many factors, but the most important concept for the people right now are faith, reassurance, and hard work.
Faith behind the idea of Crypto, reassurance that BTC/Crypto is not dead, and hard work behind the technology that will enforce a free world of tomorrow decoupled from the cartel and their toxic system that sucks the soul out of people.
I am excited about Pax Gold and even the possibility of staking the coin on a wallet earning compound interest. We are nearing a new age of banking/finance where the micro percents skimmed off the top are yours to keep. Every time I think of a social security number I think of a bar-code and ledger accounting for all the wealth the elites have harvested from a single person. I would assert people in 2019 create virtually $1,000,000 or more of value through out their lifetime (adjusted for inflation of course, trollol) that is recycled into the system via the matrix of financial control and enforcement.
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Unrelated: This video gives a great update on where I think we are from a macro psychological perspective and gives good general insight on global adoption.
https://youtu.be/Hx-V4DQhXeA
Countries like Venezuela, Brazil, also Africa are seeking the solution of Blockchain and BTC and Crypto, Brazil is considering adding BTC and ETH as a form of reserve currency. Stay frosty and HODL on .. were in for a wild ride.
submitted by MattMan970 to Bitcoin [link] [comments]

r/Bitcoin recap - May 2019

Hi Bitcoiners!
I’m back with the 29th monthly Bitcoin news recap. (sorry a bit late this month)
For those unfamiliar, each day I pick out the most popularelevant/interesting stories in Bitcoin and save them. At the end of the month I release them in one batch, to give you a quick (but not necessarily the best) overview of what happened in bitcoin over the past month.
You can see recaps of the previous months on Bitcoinsnippets.com
A recap of Bitcoin in May 2019
Adoption
Development
Security
Mining
Business
Research
Education
Regulation & Politics
Archeology (Financial Incumbents)
Price & Trading
Fun & Other
submitted by SamWouters to Bitcoin [link] [comments]

Diary of a Douchebag: FC does a gun show, Part 2.

Friday, 1PM: I leave work early. I have to set up for the gun show early because the only time my mechanic has for the alignment rack for the next week and a half is friday afternoon and I am in need of an alignment to keep my Michelin Defender's in a nice predictable wear pattern.
My loadout this weekend includes a whole bunch of the usual stuff, Colts, Sigs, HK's, Glock's a few Springfields and four Daniel Defense rifles and an FN SLP Mk 1. I haul over a few used guns that I just took on trade too, a Tavor 556 LH and a Mossberg 500 that I got for $100 off someone wanting to trade it towards a new Glock 23. Four trips with the hand truck gets everything in before the rain starts.
I have reserved two tables but I have enough merchandise to cover three. The exhibitor tells me tables went up so two tables cost me $160 for the weekend and I consider it a small expense to view the express train to hell that is the gun culture.
45 minutes flies by as I set up my table just the way I want it and I get to Lenny's to get my alignment done. He's been doing an alignment for me no charge for the past 3 years after I told him NOT to buy an old Browning shotgun he fell in love with on gunbroker. He wanted to use it for upland hunting, sporting clays, skeet and anything moving through the air killing. It was an old gun that had FIXED barrel chokes - Full and Full. I told him RUN LIKE HELL. He said my advice saved him from a $1500 mistake and the least he can do is keep my car on the road no charge. He gets my car set up on his $80,000 hunter alignment rack and finds my toe in is way out of spec. He spends a few minutes banging around with a wrench and everything is all good. As he's doing that, since I know he won't take my money - I walk to the 7-11 across the street and grab him a tall boy of Rolling Rock. His week is so shitty that he shotguns it faster than Brett Kavanaugh circa 1982. Time to head home. I'm halfway there when the phone rings ring ring
FC: Go for FC
1: Hey FC, it's Captain Bob. How's it going?
FC: Good! I got your stuff fixed and ready to go on my desk.
1: I can be there in 15 minutes!
FC: I'll turn around, see you in 15.
Captain Bob is a four stripe left seat pilot for Delta on the triple. We love talking airplanes and guns. He's had me tune up an old 220 he wants to use at a class he's taking at FLETC later this year. Like a good pilot, he believes in a comprehensive pre flight inspection. And since his type rating says B777 and not P220, he wanted someone to make sure he's not taking a dud to class. All I did to it was give it a visual, clean and lube and although it probably didn't need it - it had a 20 year old recoil spring so I installed a new one just as a precaution.
I get back to my desk and get his gun ready, cleared and slide locked back as he walks in the door. He just got home from running a 777LR to Johannesburg and back and is very pleased to see his old 220 ready to roll. I take my glasses off and point out he's got a little bit of slide peening in a few spots but just keep it lubricated and it's normal wear and tear since he does not shoot it much.
He asks me if I have any 300 blackout ammo, I pull a case of 220gr OTM off the shelf. I tell him $450 on the ammo and the pistol inspection and recoil spring is on the house and he's having none of it. Hands me five crisp hundos and tells me to keep it. Just as I'm tucking the cash into my desk drawer, my door opens up and since I'm not wearing my glasses - I see a blurry silhouette of.....is that wonder woman? HUGE TITS on a small frame. I can't tell what's going on.
FC: Hi!
Lady: Hey FC, it's Lisa. I was just getting my wedding dress altered next door and wanted to say hi!
FC: Oh hey! I'm not wearing my glasses so I have no idea what's happening!
Lisa: See you tomorrow!
FC: I'l be there! So anyways Bob, that was strange. I am normally not used to having my door flung open by halfway attractive women.....
Bob: Neither am I! You should see some of the FA's on the J'burg route!
We have a laugh. Some more airplane talk about the old 72's and I tell him about the time I greased it in the box on the A320. Turns out he flew A320's as well as boeings and we revel in the differences in both the airplanes. I really like the Airbus design and their workflow even though Boeing guys love to hate it. He's happy with his 220 and we pull chocks.
I head home, throw a ribeye on the grill and go to bed early. I've got a busy day in the morning.
Saturday morning I wake up at 7AM and look at my to do list. Shit shower and shave. The gun show closes at 5. Lisa's wedding is at 6. The venue is at the lake 39 minutes from the VFW hall. I have a plan. I will leave STRAIGHT to the venue from the gun show and I'll put on dress clothes below the belt. After all, how often do you look at another man's pants? I throw on an HK black NO COMPROMISE Polo shirt untucked with a black alligator belt and Canali navy slacks with my new Allen Edmonds boulevards in black. Socks by Brumell and boxers by Fruit of the Loom. I walk into the VFW hall with a non iron Lauren white spread collar shirt, Ted Baker tie and Canali jacket slung over my shoulder. Nobody notices the pitter patter sound of leather soles on the concrete as the show starts coming to life.
It's 8:55. Lets get this show on the road.
The loudspeaker crackles and lets everyone in the hall know the doors are about to open up and asks us to check all our guns for ammo and zip ties. I get my table ready and pull out my 4473's on clipboards and check my pens. FFL in frame is standing up on the table, everything is tagged and tied. There will be no discharge of firearms at my table as a result.
9AM: Show opens. It's dead. Deader than dead. Like, life support dead. Typically there is a line from the entryway of the hall and around the building to get into the show every time.
This is not the show of years ago. This summer has been atrocious. I talked to the promoter and lots of vendors did not reserve tables for this and the next show. The numbers are way down.
Some people start to trickle in but it's not a good sign.
9:30AM: A fellow walks up and asks me if I have a Sig 226 TACOPS with TB in stock. I don't but vendors do. He drove 2 hours to this show to try and find one since his local place did not have it. They're on contract with sig and refuses to order one from distribution to make him happy and Sig has no idea when they're going to make more out of New Hampshire. Well, thanks to Ron Cohen making 26 SKU's for every single pistol - that's what you get.
9:41AM: Fellow wearing an INFOWARS shirt molests way too much merchandise on my table than I'm comfortable with. I shoot a knowing eye roll to Noah over at the next table. He's a 27 year old jewish gold bullion dealer from Long Island that votes libertarian and laughs at all my jokes. He adjusts his RON PAUL FOR PRESIDENT banner hanging off the edge of his table as I wait for Finger McBangerson here to go away so I can wipe down all my stuff.
10:23AM: Guy walks up to me and he says he's looking for a shotgun for competition. I point him towards the SLP at the end of the table.
10:24AM: Older fellow walks up to me and says he's looking for a gun for his wife as he lifts up a Colt Commander. I tell him that will definitely kill his wife. Guy looking at the SLP cracks up laughing. Older guy looks at me mortified. Then he gets the joke. Asks me about suitability of a steel framed colt commander for her. I say probably not a good first choice. Perhaps you should send her to an NRA basic pistol class.
10:39AM: Guy asks me what's the best I'll do on a Glock 17L. I tell him the tag is already priced more than fair. He asks if he can buy it with cash if he can get a discount. I'm like let me see. I ask him if he's got a state CWL. He says yes. I take off $20. He says it's a deal, hands me a stack of money, current CWL and a California drivers license.
FC: Do you have residency in this state?
1: No, I'm here visiting for work
FC: And you want me to sell you a gun with a California drivers license and no residency?
1: DUDE! KEEP IT DOWN! Do you have any idea what would happen if people found out I didn't live here?
FC: YES I DO! They wouldn't be a party to you breaking the law!
I hand him all his shit back and tell him to get on the next flight to Fresno.
12:01 PM: Lunchtime. I pick up my sammich from Jersey mikes and nobody fails to interrupt me to throw money at me. This is not a very good sign.
12:16 PM: I am scarfing down the last of my sandwich as Infowars shirt guy comes back around. We chat a bit about 1911's and he eventually tries to convince me that I need to buy the water filter that Alex Jones is selling to keep us from turning homosexual. I tell him now I'm not gay, but look at these shoes. I pull my left hock up and put a nice shiny new Allen Edmonds boulevard on the table. He seems to recoil in horror. As he walks away, I tell him he didn't even notice that I had them straight laced! They're fabulous!
Nobody understands my humor.
12:33 PM: The vendor to the left of me is selling clothing offensive to the left. MAGA hats, anti snowflake shirts, ISIS hunting permit graphic tees, etc. I debate calling one of my guys and having "MAKE 45ACP GREAT AGAIN" hats made up. I call up r_shackleford and he thinks this is genius. We trade witty banter back and forth for a few minutes.
12:49 PM: The vendor in front of me is a gigantic pawn shop with 16 tables. There's a woman trying to sell them a rifle, and not succeeding at all. Sam looks over at me and points and says to her "you know, he buys guns too!"
FUCK YOU SAM.
FUCK YOU LONG.
FUCK YOU HARD.
The hambeast approaches and thrusts a rifle in my face. "WE BUILT IT CUSTOM" she says. "I NEED MONEY FOR CHEMO" she says. The barrel says 223 Wylde. The lower says Aero Precision. The price tag says $1500 OBO. I tell her she'd be lucky if she got HALF that in this economy. She complains that they really need the money and her two demon spawn that are traveling with her seem to be tired of her getting the same speech from every vendor in the hall.
NO YOUR GODDAMN HOMEBUILT 223 WYLDE AR15 IS NOT WORTH $1500
It's not even worth $750
It's worth MAYBE the same price as a new PSA rifle - $350, $450 tops if you threw in the little girl.
Editors note (start voice over here): Hi, I'm Matt Damon. Human trafficking is no laughing matter. For just a small donation of $50 or more, you can fight human trafficking. I prefer that you donate to Rapha House International, a charity dedicated to preventing sex trafficking and providing care and treatment to its victims. If you go to the post in the top of guns and donate, you can even stop shitposters like FirearmConcierge from posting stuff like this for the rest of the month if you donate enough money. This sort of support can only be made possible from viewers like you. Please, donate today. Stop the suffering. For the little girls. For reddit. For America.
The lady looks at me like a truck stop rapist and inevitably proclaims that SHE KNOWS WHAT SHE'S GOT. Words fail me. I shake my head as she walks away with her demon spawn and I shoot a look back at sam and mouth very carefully YOU FUCKER back at him. Sam cracks up laughing.
1:12PM: I'm asked if that's a Dead Air Sandman on my table. I say yes. Guy asks to look at it and explains to his friend that it's a DAA Sandman and talks about the mounting system.
FC: You know your stuff.
1: Yeah I just bought one.
FC: I'm the only DAA dealer around here, you don't look familiar. Who'd you get it from?
1: Silencershop. Used the kiosk at a dealer in another city 1.5 hours away
FC: Uh, I stock the sandman and would have made you a deal. Why'd you do go through them if you don't mind my asking?
1: Well it was a timesaver.
FC: How's that? I mean that place I know is an hour and a half away without traffic, so you made a trip there to do your stuff - then back. That's 3 hours. Then another 3 hours after your stamps clear - so that's 6 hours in a car total. I can call the PD, make an appointment for you to roll your prints and you're done in 15 minutes. Photos at CVS are another 15 minutes. How is 6 hours a timesaver instead of 30 minutes?
1: Well I just knew that if I had to make more than one stop I'd never do it, so it was spend 6 hours in a car and get it done in one shot or spend 15 minutes doing fingerprints or photos and being too lazy to do the other one and never sending in the paperwork. So this was the better choice for me.
FC: Uh. Okay?
1: Why don't you have a kiosk?
FC: I'm not paying $9000 for something that's going to save you time and cost me money and then have to deal with being tech support and having a device in my place of business that compresses my own margins. We're down to making $50 on a can from making $350. This isn't a position I'm interested in taking.
1: Well, sucks to be you. I'm buying all my cans from silencershop now!
FC: Enjoy your 6 hour drive.
1:30 PM: Man walks up with an old stainless combat commander colt. Series 70. No original box and sights. Looks well used.
Thinks I’m crazy when I say I won’t give him $1000 on trade.
1:39 PM: Guy comes back. Guy wants me to put a can on his 1917 eddystone that is not threaded. He asks what he can get for $150
1:45 PM: Lady picks up a Trijicon RMR and asks to turn it on. I shove a battery in it and turn it on.
1: This is a laser sight right?
FC: This is an RMR from Trijicon and RMR stands for Ruggedized Miniature Reflex sight - it uses a laser of sorts and projects it onto this lens here....
1: THIS COSTS $500? AND IT DOES NOT EVEN PUT IT ON THE TARGET?
FC: Well if you just look through the lens here you can see the red dot projected onto the glass.....
1: I CAN BUY A $30 LASER POINTER AND DUCT TAPE IT TO MY GUN AND I'D BE $470 CHEAPER AND IT WOULD PUT THE LASER ON THE BAD GUY! WHAT IS THIS GARBAGE YOU'RE TRYING TO SELL?
She walks away. My mouth is agape.
2:15PM: Old guy walks up and points at a Glock 34 I have on the table. MY FRIEND BOUGHT A GLOCK IN 89 WITH NYPD AND SHOT HIMSELF HOLSTERING IT. I DONT TRUST THE DAMN THINGS and shuffles away without me having time for a rebuttal
2:21PM: Someone walks up asking me if I want to buy a used les Baer Comanche. I tell him I buy when I can make money. I look at it. It’s clean.
He wants $1600. Street is about $1600, that's all the money. Street the gun sells for about $1799 NEW, which means I can buy it for less than $1600 new. I tell him this. He looks at me like Elizabeth Warren looks at Brett Kavanaugh and shuffles away. I shake my head as I notice a familiar face walk up. I can't place it. He looks at some guns.
2:25PM: I'm asked if I have a card from the familiar stranger. I reach down into my wallet and fish one out, I hand it to him and he smiles at me. It finally clicks.
FC: Dr Livingstone, I presume.
Doc: I haven't seen you in years, how have you been?
(The doc is FC's old therapist. He can't say hi to me walking around due to HIPAA but if I open a dialogue, it's okay)
FC: Eh, same old shit different day. I uh made some mistakes a few weeks ago and I thought of you.
Doc: Oh really? How so.
FC: Well uh. You remember that day when I told you to go back to the Office of the Bursar at UCLA and ask for a refund on your $125,000 post graduate education because it was nothing but academic detritus?
Doc: Well, I hadn't thought about it for a few years but it sounds like something you would say.
FC: It was right after you told me that I used 3 different quotes from 3 different academics in a span of less than 5 minutes to answer your question. You said that I intellectualize as a defense because I don't like getting close to people. I said you're full of shit. You asked me do I even know what intellectualize means? I said of course I know what it means, what do you think I'm some kind of idiot? Then you sat there grinning like a Cheshire cat at the thought of making me eat my own words.
Doc: Haha. Now, that sounds familiar. I remember that.
FC: Well I don't know how many patients are willing to say it but you were right and I was wrong.
Doc: I don't get much pleasure in hearing that, but did you learn anything about yourself?
FC: It took a few years to realize you may have been right all along but yeah.
Doc: Then what does it matter who's right or wrong as long as you learned something?
FC: Hmm. That's not bad. How's business?
Doc: Full appointment book and not taking new patients.
FC: I guess you could say it's........a little crazy?
Doc: I missed your humor. Tell me about this Glock 45...
I show him a few different guns and crack jokes about disgruntled patients. He says he'll think about arming himself what with crime and mentally unstable people being growth sectors in this post-trump apocalyptic nightmare. I tell him to be fore warned is to be fore armed. He seems reticent, but I can only lead the horse to water. I can't make him drink.
2:51PM: Fellow walks up.
1: I need a colt ladysmith. Do you have one?
FC: the colt or the ladysmith?
1: The colt ladysmith
FC: is it a colt or a smith?
1: smith
FC: which model?
1: the ladysmith!
FC: I know but I need to know what model. They put that on a bunch of different guns
1: it’s the one with writing on the side of the gun. It says. LADY SMITH on it. You know the one
I realize the strongest case for repealing the second amendment is spending a day talking to people at the gun show.
3PM: Two hours left to go! The end is in sight! I haven't sold a single fucking gun yet!
3:02 PM: Man walks up. Hey do you have the new Sig 925?
FC: You mean 365?
1: No the 925
FC: Sig does not make a 925
1: Yes they do, it's the new one.
FC: The 365?
1: No! The 925!
FC: Can you show me a picture?
1: It's the one on the magazine.
FC: Most of sigs guns have magazines.
1: I mean the one in print. It's on the cover.
FC: The cover of the periodical you mean?
1: Yeah! You know the new one!
FC: Well if it's on the cover, it should be easy to find on google. Can you show me a picture?
1: There's nothing coming up on google for the Sig 925
FC: Maybe perhaps its because it's the sig 365?
1: I'm telling you it's not that. It's the new one they just came out with. It's the 925.
FC: Care to make a wager?
1: No.
FC: If you bring me a photo I can try to narrow it down.
1: I'll find the magazine at home and bring it in tomorrow.
FC: Periodical.
1: Whatever.
3:11: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SUFSB2plwzM
3:12: Numismatist neighbor Noah asks me a question
Noah: Hey! What's a hi point?
FC: A cry for help!
(everyone laughs)
Noah: No I mean price wise?
FC: Like $100, they're garbage guns.
Me and Noah start talking. I am moving more and more libertarian every day. He's the treasurer of his local LP chapter in Suffolk county. For a jewish kid from Riverhead, we sure have a lot in common. We get into an animated debate on the virtues of Kelo v New London in that it was a shitty position for the town of New London to take Susette Kelo's house for redevelopment under eminent domain. If they wanted to redevelop it, for the government to use eminent domain is a government run amok. As a libertarian, he hates government overreaching - as someone who also hates that sort of thing, we are in very vocal agreeance.
The tshirt vendor is listening to us debate the merits of the case and how the SCOTUS created a TERRIBLE precedent regarding government using the takings clause and when we finish he asks us a question.
TShirtGuy: How the fuck do you two know so much about a supreme court case?
Noah: Well, when you went to college and you're an economics and pre law major....
FC: Let me make it simple. WE ARE NERDS!
Everyone has a laugh.
TShirtGuy: Speaking of funny, check this out! He holds up a shirt.
It says in big print on the front: the the reason gun shows exist is so women can know what it’s like for when they drag men to the mall
I chuckle.
3:13 PM: I get in an argument with the republican candidate for office of something or other on gun laws. He is stupid and he is going to lose.
3:23 PM: A nice lady walks up. She looks familiar. She looks at some guns and feels up a 226 and remarks how well she likes how it handles.
FC: You're Bernice, aren't you?
Bernice: Why yes I am! You do not look familiar. How do I know you?
FC: You're still working at the courthouse right?
Bernice: That's right!
FC: Judge Snyder, right?
Bernice: No! He moved up to the appellate circuit last month it's...
FC: Judge Reinhold! That's right, one of his JA's called me to buy a gun last month. I forgot Christine told me, you're right.
Bernice: Holy crap, you have an incredible memory. When was the last time you were in front of Judge Snyder?
FC: Four years ago. I was the one that filed the motion citing the big lebowski.
Bernice: OH MY GOD THAT WAS YOU? I remember that!
FC: Yeah and I had to go dumpster diving to get my phone back. Shit, was that really 4 years ago? Fuck.
We talk more about guns and stuff. She loves her old West German 226. I tell her that if she really wants to have some fun, she should ask Judge Snyder to tag along on his next range day. About two years ago, the judge called me up asking for some advice. He's Tet offensive era USMC and wanted a new toy to reach out and touch someone and was dead set on getting a new SR25.
I talked him out of it because SR25's are stupid expensive. I knew of another dealer that had a T&E 20" SR25 that they were looking to unload cheap and I told him that with the amount of money he'd save going to the T&E gun versus the new one - the delta would more than cover a Nightforce NXS, rings and mounting and that would save him money and be a good performer. I'm friends with his daughter on facebook and they both looked like they had a lot of fun ringing the gong at the gun club.
Bernice is impressed. Too bad she's not my type, we'd get along fantastically if I was 15 years older.
4 PM: 60 minutes left to this shit show.
4:04PM: The loudspeaker crackles. ATTENTION ATTENTION: BRETT KAVANAUGH HAS JUST BEEN CONFIRMED TO THE SUPREME COURT.
The proletariat rejoices and hooting and hollering typically reserved for the LSU game breaks out in the hall.
ALSO WILL THE RED JEEP PARKED IN THE FIRE LANE PLEASE MOVE - YOU ARE BLOCKING THE BBQ GUY FROM LEAVING. RED JEEP. MOVE OR YOU WILL BE TOWED.
4:11 PM: Guy walks up in civvies.
1: I wanna buy this but I’m not a state resident
FC: well what’s your deal? Give me some more to work with.
1: I’m from Texas but I’m in the military
FC: if you got your orders - PCS to any base in this state says you’re a state resident, but if you don't - I can't help you. I know a lot of guys don't travel around with their orders....
JUST AS I SAY THAT the guy pulls out a wad of hundreds out of his pocket and his PCS paperwork, signed, rubber stamped and billeted.
THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE.
I give him the clipboard as I look at his paperwork. No blank spaces, approved change of station to Barksdale AFB, address reads base housing, everything is in order for the young airman.
HOLY FUCKING SHIT. THIS IS AMAZING.
Forms done correct on the first swing.
I AM WAITING FOR THE OTHER SHOE TO DROP.
I call in the transaction and they tell me that the national system is down. NO IDEA WHEN IT'S GOING TO BE BACK UP.
I tell the USAF that the system is down and we can't do anything. He takes my card and hands me money and says just call him when it's ready to be picked up. Huh. Okay, he's cool with that. His girlfriend lives over here so he's back here every weekend. Done! I mark up the paperwork with some notes.
4:23 PM: One guy just walked up and told me that he had no idea HK made rifles. Apparently made a bunch of rifles a few years ago and stamped glocks name on them for Glock. Since Glock can't be found out to be making rifles. This captures the attention of another guy who asks me if my Glocks on the table have fluted firing pins. I tell him they do not make fluted firing pins. That makes no sense. He says yes they do make sense. They're fluted so they shoot underwater.
4:28 PM: Noah's table has someone in front of it debating buying some gold. As they delve into the discussion of gold and FIAT currency, I hear the following.
1: Bitcoin is a webpage. It’s like buying stock. Bitcoin issues shares and it dilutes so the price goes down.
Noah: I don't think that's how it works.
1: You’re basically buying a part of a big webpage
FC: This is like listening to someone try to explain that pi is exactly 3.
Noah: What's wrong with you?
FC: I am the Anthony Bourdain of the gun world. I eat, I drink and I yell at idiots.
4:45 PM It's getting close to show close, I need to get ready for the wedding. I grab my Lauren shirt that thankfully is non iron and just dressy enough to work and just casual enough to be worn without a tie if you need to and whip off my HK polo. I put on the shirt and tuck it in as I notice a lovely couple walk up out of the corner of my eye. Its Jim and Jane, Jane is a pharmacist that works at the hospital and Jim is a Gastroenterology resident at the hospital too. They buy lots of guns from me. I finish tucking in my shirt as we talk shop.
Jim wants 6 cans, 3 handgun and 3 rifle and wants to know what his options are. I rattle off all the options I would look at and I write some down on a legal pad for Jane to show him on the computer when he gets home. We talk 762 vs 556, 45 vs 9mm and direct thread vs QD for about 10 minutes as I tie off my blue Ted Baker tie into a Pratt knot. The apex of the tie just touches my belt buckle. Length is right on the money, and I didn't even have a mirror. Jane approves of my knot and color selection. Go me.
4:55 PM: Fabulousness achieved, I call back in and find out national system is still down. FUCK. Well this is gonna have to wait till tomorrow. I shove Airman Cecil O'Malley's paperwork under the table and start stowing stuff since the show is about to close.
4:59 PM: Table is covered up and FC is walking out the door as the announcement crackles over the loudspeaker. THE SHOW IS CLOSED. PLEASE LEAVE THROUGH THE FRONT DOOR.
5:01 PM: On the way to the wedding! I stop at Target along the way because I've forgotten to get a card. I find one that says "It was meant to brie" on the front. It has some greeting card herpes, aka glitter on it but I have no time to be picky. As I'm in line to checkout I write something cheeky.
"I always said love was cheesy and I camembert it sometimes.....Love, FC"
The cashier scans it, I plug my amex into the card reader as I slip in a yard in there and seal up the envelope and slide it into my jacket pocket.
The ride to the lake breaks every speed limit in two counties.
5:45PM: I arrive 15 minutes before the ceremony is about to begin and the parking staff puts me in the back lot. I hike over to the open bar and get a fresca. I'm supposed to behave myself, so FC quit drinking and is just chilling with a fresca as he scans the room.
I know NOBODY at this wedding except the bride, groom and MAYBE the bride's massage therapist. Nope. I know nobody here. Awwwkward. I behave myself and sip on a fresca as the wedding starts. She gets married. She says yes. He says yes. FC is an ordained minister and can step up and marry someone in case there's an emergency but my services will not be needed at this wedding because things are going smoother than a cold filtered miller genuine draft. It's all good. The DJ announces the new couple and they walk down the aisle together as husband and wife for the first time. The music starts playing.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNEgUPKxk7A
ITS HEAVY D AND THE BOYZ! I HAVE ALWAYS WANTED TO GO TO A WEDDING WHERE THEY PLAY THE COUPLE OFF TO HEAVY D! I mention this to the people sitting next to me and they're like it's just like hitch!
I'm like what?
They go on to explain to me that it's a movie. Starring Will Smith. Huh. Didn't see that one.
5:45 PM: The open bar and the food is coming out. I look around and I definitely do not know ANYBODY HERE. I need to eat and go home. I grab a plate of cocktail shrimp and some lobster sliders and sit down at a picnic table away from the crowd. I don't even notice a busty brunette with cleavage showing also sitting at the table staring at her phone across from me until she says hi.
1: Hi.
FC: Hi.
(I scarf down a lobster slider. Munch munch)
1: So how do you know the lovely couple?
FC: Well she was a friend of a friend and next thing you know I'm showing up to the Christmas party and the wedding. Then Seth is showing up and then they're getting married. You?
1: I work with Lisa, I'm a flight attendant. But I've been out of work for a few months. We had this thing at work. It's called a fume event. I happens when well uh how do I say?
FC: Contaminated bleed air via the pneumatic air conditioning kit - or PACK - gets into the cabin, causing all sorts of respiratory irritation and all sorts of other things for the crew. You're on the 320, right?
1: The airbus? Yeah. Me and Lise are also on the....
FC: 321 and the 319. Yeah, I'm familiar with the technology.
1: You're a pilot.
FC: Not exactly. I just know airplanes really well.
1: So you're an aerospace engineer.
FC: I wouldn't go that far. Hahaha. That's stretching it. A lot.
1: Let me get this right. You're friends with Lisa and Seth, you know airplanes, you're the only one at this wedding actually wearing a suit......
FC: To be fair, it's Louisiana in October. We're lucky most of the folks here aren't wearing Mossy Oak and Realtree.
1: Hahahahahhah! You must live in Baton Rouge!
FC: I do.
1: Me too! What part of the city? I live in (names neighborhood)
FC: I'm over in (neighborhood next to her)
1: OH MY GOD! That's 10 minutes from my house! So anyways, you're smart, you're funny, where have you been all my life? I'm Ally.
FC: I'm Will.
1: You wanna get dinner together? I literally do not know anyone else here and I was thinking about leaving before I met you.
FC: Uh sure. Lemme just top this fresca off.
1: I'll join you.
6:15 We're told by the bartenders to grab a ceremonial wedding tervis tumbler with a patch commemorating the happy couple's nuptials hermetically sealed inside. They didn't want a bunch of red solo cups going to the dumpster so they decided to ball out. I walk up to the table where there's literally 200 tumblers in varying colors to choose from and I grab a random one as Ally grabs one too. We head to the bar, she fills her with vodka and sprite. I top off with ginger ale because I'm staying sober and I have to drive 45 minutes back to casa de FC in BTR.
She asks me how I know so much about airplanes, I tell her it's been a lifelong obsession and I've done some ground school on the 320 and the 737 and I much prefer the 320. I ask her what's tough about her job and she tells me that most people don't know they only get paid when the doors close. I say yeah, block time is a real bitch sometimes. She looks at me like I'm crazy. I'm like what? She's like HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT BLOCK TIME? I told you, I know airplanes. We chat some more as the crowd gets drunker and drunker and more ridiculous on the dance floor. Someone requested Strokin' by Clarence Carter and the DJ ACTUALLY PLAYED IT. Goddamnit Lisa! HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF A DO NOT PLAY LIST? Wow.
7:10 PM We find some seats for dinner as the buffet opens up, I pile a bunch of chicken marsala and beef wellington on my plate and we head back to the table. She's only a few years older than me and cannot believe that I am single. She asks if I've tried tinder. I tell her the tinder story about me being stuffed into the back of a police car and it is met with raucous laughter.
1: So, do you dance?
FC: I do a lot of things, but I don't dance. Baton Rouge is the city that rhythm forgot.
1: I don't really dance either. As a matter of fact, I'm perfectly content to people watch all night with you here by my side.
Her hand ran down to touch mine. It had a ring on it.
FC: What does your husband think about that?
Next thing I know, Lisa and Seth have dropped by the table to say hello. They're taking pictures with everyone and we can't continue the conversation we were just having. Lisa dives in to hug Ally, Seth gives me a handshake, sips my drink and asks why there isn't any bourbon in that tumbler.
FC: Gotta behave myself. Long drive back home.
Ally: OH MY GOD LISA! Will is FANTASTIC! Where have you been keeping him? He's funny, he's amazing and he looks hot in a suit! If I wasn't married, he'd be the perfect guy!
(We're cut off by Lisa, she looks at me sternly.)
Lisa: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?
FC: What?
Lisa: Yesterday! When I was getting my wedding dress fitted! You called me a half attractive woman.....
FC: It's not a normal occurrence! Most of the women who open my door are total heifers! For real! Take the compliment!
Lisa cracks up, and Seth who has had a few drinks laughs so hard that he damn near falls over. You can hear the cackle of his laugh carry across the lake. The best man props him back up and they all have a laugh. The wedding planner slides in and tells the bride that her cake has been outside of refrigeration for an hour and 15 minutes now and is structurally deficient. They need to cut it now before it collapses in upon itself like a black hole. Lisa grabs Ally, Seth grabs me and the rest of the table follows. We're now part of the wedding cake cutting crew.
7:15 PM: The entourage all takes their Instagram positions as Lisa cuts into her structurally deficient cake and Seth resists the urge to do anything cheeky and fun with frosting. It's cute, everyone toasts the newlyweds.
7:20 PM: I pull Lisa aside privately and I ask her - what the fuck is Ally's deal? "If I wasn't married he'd be the perfect guy?" WHO THE FUCK SAYS THAT? A married woman? At a wedding? To a guy she JUST MET?
Lisa: Look, I have no idea how her marriage is going or what her deal is. But just because there's a goalie doesn't mean you can't score.
FC: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
Lisa: It means that maybe, if she's throwing herself at you......you should catch her. I gotta go throw the bouquet. Brb.
FC: .....
7:25 Lisa goes to throw her bouquet and Ally has found me and is back at my side.
1: Where were we? I was just saying to Lisa that I was wondering where a guy like you has been all my life? You are awesome.
FC: I am awesome, and you are married.
1: Yeah, I know. Come on, I really want you......I mean I really want you......to go photobooth with me. Come on, it'll be fun.
She grabs my arm and drags me to the photobooth and she puts ridiculous hats and stuff on me. I'm like no, I've been looking ridiculous enough from birth. i'm good. She literally begs me with puppy dog eyes and does that thing where she shows cleavage.
FC: Isn't this like against one of the ten commandments? Thou shalt not......photobooth with another man's wife?
1: Hmm. Yeah, I guess. You're really sweet though. If I was single, I'd be all over you right now.
FC: Who says that? Really?
1: So, answer me this. You're not an engineer. You're not a pilot. What do you do?
FC: Gun dealer.
1: So if I had something like an AR15 that needed some work, you'd be the guy to call?
FC: Maybe, depending on what you needed - there's a lot of things where I'll just tell you flat out what you're trying to do is uneconomical and a bad idea.
1: Well, I'd really like it if you could check out some of my equipment sometime.
FC, internal monologue: WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE
FC, external monologue: Bring it by the gun show this weekend and I'll see what I can do.
I crack an uneasy smile as she gets up to go use the bathroom. I decide it's time to get the fuck out of here.
8:11 Making my escape plan proves to be a little tougher than I expected. The parking at the venue at the lake is dark and unlit and I have to navigate my way back to my car in the dark using the light from my phone. I reach into my jacket and I realize that their card is still inside. Fuck. I gotta go back. I turn around and head back to the gift table and I use some ninja recon skills I picked up in catholic school to make sure Ally is nowhere nearby. The coast is clear. I walk up to the little birdcage they have for cards, drop mine in confidently and get ready to turn on my heel and leave. I start making my way back to the parking lot when Seth is just walking out of the bathroom next to the gift table.
1: Hey man, you heading home?
FC: I am now, forgot to drop off your card.
1: Ally thought you left without saying goodbye to her, so she asked me for your number. I gave it to her.
FC: Oh dear lord.
1: What?
FC: Did you hear that woman? "If I was single, you'd be the perfect guy!" Those words are not in a vocabulary of any married woman I know.
1: Dude, you just gotta chill out and go with the flow man. It's not your marriage. If she wants a piece of you, cut her off a slice.
FC: Are you serious?
1: When I met Lisa, she was still married to Freddie. Look at us now, 7 years later and we're happy. You want to be happy, don't you?
FC: Yeah but....
1: No but's! Go storm the castle! I gotta go, but I'll catch you at the afterparty tomorrow night! You going?
FC: Yeah at your house right?
1: Yeah, what time the gun show wrap up?
FC: 4, so I'll be out by 5.
1: I got steaks going on the grill at 3, I'll get save a nice one for you. You still a medium rare guy?
FC: You know it!
1: I think Ally is gonna be there too, you two should get to know each other a little better.
FC: That's what I'm afraid of!
Seth goes back to his wedding, I hop in the car and drive home. It's almost 10PM as I approach the Jersey mikes by my house. I stop in to grab a sandwich for Sunday.
Just as I walk up I hear one of the sandiwch makers swear she's going to slit the throat of the next person who orders a sandwich. Eep. I tell her I need a giant 9. She starts making me one. I ask her if she's trying to get out of here right at 10? She says yeah, she's trying to catch the end of the Yankees/Red Sox game. I tell her my old man was from Brighton and my mom was from Elmhurst, so there's no love lost there. We have a laugh. She caught the Yankees pummeling the A's in the wild card on Wednesday. I whip out my phone and check the score for her. Yankees are up 6-2. I tell her she should be able to catch the end of it at home or whatever sports bar she's going to. She tells me she's going to the outback steakhouse the next block over to watch it and they better have the game on when she rolls up in 15. I tell her I'll do her one better. I dated the bartender there (once, she friendzoned me) and I'll message her on facebook to have it on for you. It is at this moment, I am asked for the second time that evening - from a strange woman I've just met - where have I been all her life?
I head home, throw my sandwich in the fridge and head to bed wondering WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?
Did FC like get game all of a sudden?
Donald Trump is President.
The Eagles won the super bowl.
You can't make this shit up.
I got one more day at the gun show too.
Postscript: As I write this, it's Columbus day and the Indians, the Redskins and Braves all got their asses handed to them.
We truly live in interesting times.
submitted by FirearmConcierge to guns [link] [comments]

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